Hi Steemers,
Today I want to talk about something that I notice a lot in everyday life.
It's about the media influencing young girls to obsess over their appearance.
Of course, traditional media plays a huge part too with all those commercils being photoshopped, where nobody looks like they actually do, but thats a whole other story. Social Media is playing a big part too. First of all, of course everybody wants to present themselves as good as possible online.
But now even Apps are offering to retouch us, even the normal girls are now not pretty enough in real life.
For example, these girly Snapchat Filters. It's like instant Photoshop for EVERYBODY!
Now don't get me wrong, Snapchat Filters are fun. And yes, they do make you look prettier. Obviously!
But do you realize how MUCH they change you? Please look at this comparison.
I took a Selfie earlier today specifically for this post. I'm wearing basically no Make-Up.
And then I put the Snapchat Filter on .. BOOM.
My eyes are lighter and bigger, my skin looks flawless, they made my face slimmer, and even the skintone changed! Seriously Snapchat?
I mean, I look much better in that right picture obviously, but the problem is that no one actually looks like that. Let me repeat that.
No one actually looks like that.
That skin doesn't even look HUMAN!
And now these poor girls are looking at images like this all the time, where they're instantly photoshopped, and then they look in the mirror and look like the picture on the left? Of course they'll feel ugly! Of course their self esteem will be lowered!
But because they look better with the Filter, they will actually post that picture on all their social media, giving other girls that see it the feeling that THEY are ugly, and so on...
It's a vicious cycle.
Now don’t get me wrong, this is not a rant against those girls because they can’t help it. They only learn what society and media teaches them. The real problem is that they actually believe it –
They believe that appearance is what defines you
They believe that looking attractive for a potential partner is a must (and that you’re only cool if you get a boyfriend!)
Of course, wanting to fit in and wanting to be “cool” has always been an essential issue in a teenager’s life. But I really feel like it has become much more drastic in the last few years, especially due to social media, wanting to represent themselves in the best way possible..
I see 13 year olds, looking like 18, dressed as if they were going to a night club, half-naked, when walking around town on a Saturday.
I hear them talking about boys, how early they’re gaining sexual experience, how early they’re starting to smoke or drink.
I see their instagram feeds and they consist 90% of selfies, and the more snapchat filters the better.
Seriously, posting everything online seems to have become more important than anyriting else!
I just see them wanting to grow up so badly, so quickly, when they don’t realize that being young and without worries is one of the most precious times in life.
These young girls nowadays are always so precocious, and it truly shocks me when I think about what I did at that age, or how I looked and what my priorities were.
Like I mentioned before, this is of course not the young girls’ fault. The media is portraying such an unrealistic image, giving the young girls superficial idols like the Kardashians, who then everyone obsesses over !
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I’ve been brought up very differently. With my mother being chinese and my Dad being german, it was pretty strict. Although I have to say, strict was not the main focus. My parents simply taught me not to be superficial.
Let me explain: I grew up reading books as a kid. Me and my sister never had a Gameboy or playstation, nor a TV in our room, or even internet in our room when we were older. That’s why I was always on the nerdier side at school, I was never one of the “cool kids”, which I now appreciate.
I had just a few close friends, didn’t drink or smoke, never went to parties etc.
Now you may say this is boring, but I actually don’t regret anything.
I was taught not to put too much focus on my appearance, but rather improve my inside.
Also, my parents never had any designer clothes or bought them for me, though we would’ve had the money. But they rather spent the family money on travels, which is the best thing you can possibly do, in my opinion today.
Now don’t get me wong, I’m not saying that I don’t care what I look like, or that I never wear makeup, or dress masculine all the time. I love doing my hair. That’s why I wrote a post about it. I love doing my make up as well. It’s fun. But what I DON’T love, is that sometimes I feel like I have to do it. That’s not fun then.
As a girl in western culture, you sometimes feel obligated to wear a certain amount of makeup, or look a certain way. Women are always “excpected” to look or behave a certain way.
And also, I know that all the makeup and fancy clothes in the world can’t change whats really important, and who I really am. That’s the important difference here.
Some very young girls don’t know the difference and that’s really a pity.
Okay, so now that my rant is over, what advice would I give to a 12-year old girl nowadays?
- You don’t have to worry about being “sexy” yet, or wearing make up all the time. You don’t need it.
- You can’t force having a boyfriend, and you shouldn’t try forcing it. If you meet a nice guy that’s fine, but the right one will come sooner or later. Don’t stress yourself.
- I know it seems important to be one of the cool kids at school currently. But there is more to life than that. Stay true to yourself.
- You get to be an adult soon enough, and long enough – for the rest of your life. While you’re still half a kid and worry-free, enjoy your time.
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So now let’s talk about females that are a little older as well. This could be about anyone between 16-30.
Girls nowadays want the “bad guys”, they want a man who has money, looks good, and who is nice - but not too nice. So you’re looking to find true love, and then you dress in such a revealing way, attracting the heartbreakers at the club (exactly the type of guy you DON’T want…) and ignoring the nerds or friendzoned guys with the big hearts? Just because the bad guys are PRETTIER?
Just because the looks of your significant other are almost (!) as important as your own?
Excuse me, but I don’t understand this.
You want to be happy, so can’t you just choose a guy with a great personality, intelligence and a big heart over someone who’s got the looks and the money? Is that really how much the media programs us to think a certain way?
Also, Girls nowadays dress revealing, and then complain when men talk to them. (I’m not talking about men hitting on you when you’re walking down the street, dressed normally – THAT is annoying!).
I’m talking about the girls who spend 3 hours getting ready, wearing the tightest and shortest skirts and crop tops, get to the club, and then get annoyed by men trying to get their number.
You present your self as if you want the attention.
Then you get the attention, and you don’t like it.
I mean yes, I do believe also that a woman should be free to wear whatever she wants without having to think about the effects on men. But still, if you dress a certain way, of course you want the attention subconsciously.
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Thanks Steemers for reading all the way through my rant, and please leave me your opinion down below, I'd love to start a Discussion about this! I'm sure there are some points I missed!
Now the only thing we can do to help change this growing problem, is to raise our kids differently. I will try my very hardest to raise my future kids similarly that I have been brought up, teaching them core values early in life!
Topics: #girls #appearance #education #superficial #beauty #socialmedia #society #rant #problems