Hola, from Spain. Places are not simply places. They come with people, shops, culture, traditions, architecture and a whole mindset. And being here in inland Andalucia in Spain is extraordinary.
The first thing you'll notice is you're surrounded by olive groves. The olive trees go over all the mountains for as far as the eye can see. Then you'd probably notice the heat. Being June now, it's very warm. At first you probably love the sun. Then like the dogs, cats and locals, you soon seek the shade. The air is warm, dry and dusty.
This is a relatively poor area, by English and Spanish standards. Many of the footloose young people will head to Madrid, Barcelona, London or the coast to find work and study. Others stay for a simple life. Although there is little work, and that which exists has long hours and low pay - there is a magic in the air. There's is a sense of supportiveness. Of love. Of family. The community is very closely knit. Dolores will be gossiping with Mercedes in the fruteria. Juan and his friends will be playing cards late into the night at the bar with a beer. Children run around in the streets playing football in the park, while waiters bring out racciones of calamares and drinks. People belong. Eating, drinking, talking and just being are celebrated. You're accepted as you are, for who you are.
Which is intimidating to start with (and still is)... but it's what everyone really wants.
The scenery/setting
My parents bought a holiday home here 10 years ago. I was having a terrible time at school, but coming here was the one thing I always looked forward to. I loved the sun, the warmth, the openness of the people, their passion when they talk about even the most mundane things. It's real. It's raw. They emote. The men are very macho and masculine. The ladies are very elegant and dolled up. They're all fiesty. They might be very nice. They may be very angry. But you know. You know where you stand with them. It was in great contrast to England where people are very reserved, indirect and never say what they think.
The simpleness of life
What is wonderful about here is the simpleness of it all. In truth life is simple. Eat heartily. Have friends. Talk. Laugh. Go to do some straight-forward, practical work, find a nice partner, have kids if you want them, go to the fiesta, go the park. Live, laugh, love. Your town is your world. You rarely leave it. And why should you? And why do you need to? You have everything you need on your doorstep.
Where I came from in England, I found the culture to be so inhumane and oppressive. As a young person there was so much pressure to get good grades, pass exams, go to a good university, get a good job so that you could get on the housing ladder. And woah! It's like you are your achievements. Your money is your lovability. And I tried to do that route. I actually did achieve a lot before I was 21. But then I just burned out. I've never felt more lost and lonely than when I was doing "what I was supposed to do".
When I burned out I decided to come to Spain. Basically because it was the happiest place I knew and I needed to get my head straight. I felt (and was) totally dysfunctional and didn't understand why.
Most of my friends here are retired English people. After selling their expensive houses in England, they've moved here for the cheaper houses, better weather and a better quality of life. It would be nice to have some more friends here, especially younger people - but they tend to prefer cities and need to be there.
Sometimes you think "should I go back to England? Meet some people my own age? Have a traditional career again?" I feel that pressure, especially when I've had months where I haven't earned much. But on the other hand, the cost of living is so low here, the quality of fruit, vegetables, fish and meat is so high. I rarely give it a second thought. It's beautiful living so close to nature, so naturally, with people who care more about living well than your bank account. I do go on little trips to London occasionally, sleeping on friend's sofas. London has lots of perks and stimulations I love, but the trips always remind me of why I don't live there.
Being here reminds of you what's really lacking in many wealthier countries. When people say "time is money" - what they don't realise is if you work all the time, you have no time for play, no time to relax, no time for sex, no time for human closeness. We need community. We need to talk. We need to be tolerant and accepting of people, no matter how wierd and wonderful they are. And also realise that money is fairly meaningless without context. The best things in life are free or cost very little.
It always reminds me of this Alan Watts talk about money.
You are involved by and large in a very strange business system which divides your day into work and play. Work is something that everybody does and you get paid to do it because nobody could care less about doing it. In other words, it is so abominable and boring that you can get paid for doing it. And the object of doing this is to make money. And the object of making money, is to go home and enjoy the money that you’ve made. When you got it, you see, “you can buy pleasure”. And in myriads of ways, you see, you go home, you are with the wealthiest people in the world and you would think that having earned your money and go home, you will have an orgy and great banquet and so on, but nobody does. They eat TV dinner which is just a warmed over airline food and then they spend the evening looking at an electronic reproduction of life which is divided from you by a glass screen. You can’t touch it, you can’t smell it, it has no color, except maybe for very wealthy it has color. But by and large, it doesn’t. And you look at this thing and you have a strange feeling, you see, that the whole procession of grades that was leading to something in the future, to that goody, that gorgeous voluptuous goody that was lying at the end of the line never quite turns up.
As technology automates away jobs, bringing a whole tidal wave of wealth / end of traditional employment (possibly though Universal Basic Income or some other means) - I can see towns like where I am becoming very popular with artists and creative types. There'll be a certain exodus from cities and people will want to be in smaller more-connected communities. People want warm weather. People want friendly shopkeepers. People want to be able to live without needing a car (being able to walk everywhere). I suspect without having city jobs to tie you down, you could choose to be somewhere like this.
The downside of being here is that sometimes it feels a bit too simple or maybe a bit boring. I miss English TV dramas and certain elements of the culture there. But again, short trips back suffice. The other thing is you back and you're unrecognisable. You see things through a different lens. "Why do you want to commute every day for an hour on jammed trains, to be an office with people who make you feel ill, doing work you don't care about, to pay for a house you never spend much time in? "
That's what I think about some of my friends there. But I don't complain. Or tell them. They're in a different culture and that's important to them. Equally they don't really understand you and your simple life where you don't feel the need to prove yourself
Sorry this has gone on way too long now. But I just wanted to give you a taste of what it's like to be a young British guy who has rocked up in Southern rural spain.
If anyone's interested in visiting the area for a holiday or to look at houses. Please leave a comment or something - I'm looking to rent out my spare rooms in my amazing house.