So you have a goal to get a girlfriend in x amount of time, that's great. You've wanted to date your whole life but nothing has ever happened. Perhaps you've spent all your time ranting on forums and watching dating advice on youtube but never taking action in real life.
Of course to get a girlfriend, you're going to need to need a plan. After all, wishing for a girlfriend without putting in the effort is never going to work otherwise Kate Upton would have come knocking on your front door by now. If you want to find love, you need to put in some effort, but first you need a plan.
Here is a map out of your plan to get a girlfriend.
0. How To Build A Life For Yourself Outside Of Dating
1. Where To Meet Women
2. How To Approach
3. How To Cope With Rejection
4. How To Get Over Approach Anxiety
5. Are There Any Women You Know Currently
How To Get A Life Outside Of Dating
A lot of advice you read on the internet is about how to get a girlfriend. What is equally important is once you have a girlfriend, how do you make her stay? Instead of focusing all of your time and effort into trying to impress women, you should spend a good amount of time in working on yourself to make yourself more appealable to the opposite sex. And sure, much of this advice won't help you get a girlfriend but it will definitely make her more likely to stay once you do find someone.
- What are you passionate about? (besides women)
- Develop some hobbies and talents.
- Work on your social life. Try to go out and meet people for the purpose of being friends with them.
- Go to the gym regularly, at least twice a week.
- Watch what you eat.
- Spend more time with friends and family
- Get out of the house more.
- Work on your education, try to shoot for higher grades.
- Work hard, try to make more money.
- If you still rely on your parents, try to become more self sufficient.
- Learn a musical instrument
- Become financially stable
- Try something new, go to different places
Where To Meet Women?
First off, you're going to need to go to places to meet women. You can't sit in your room, jack off all day and expect to find love.
Write down a list of places where you can potentially meet women, this is your go-to list. Here are some ideas.
-Online dating sites such as Plenty of Fish, Tinder, or OkCupid
-School cafeteria
-Class
-Facebook
-Dog Park
-Work
Go to these places, talk to not just women but everyone there. Be nice, be friendly, be social.
How To Approach
This is the hardest part, how do you talk to her in a way without creeping her out?
If there any girls you like that you want to get to know, think about how you're going to approach her and what you're going to say.
One way is to simply remember how others approached you in the past and how it made you feel. Think about a friend who talked to you first, how did he/she do it? Obviously it worked because you two are now friends. So if you can remember how your friend approached you and made you feel good about yourself, all you have to do is emulate the same tactic but on a girl you want to get to know.
How To Cope With Rejection
Here are some tactics to coping with rejection. The better you are at bouncing off rejection, the more succesful you will be.
1. Rejection is simply a form of incompatibility
2. Simply don't get your hopes up in the first place so rejection won't hurt as bad
3. Rejection will hurt, but never trying will hurt even more
4. Rejection is a good thing because it means that you're trying
5. The more you fail, the greater it will be to actually succeed.
6. You are less likely to take something for granted if you really worked for it.
7. View the asking out process as simply a social experiment so when you fail, that was all a part of the plan anyways.
How To Deal With Your Approach Anxiety
Here are some tactics to get over your approach anxiety.
1. Try to logically think why you're scared of approaching her. Is it fear of rejection? Fear of not knowing what to say? Fear of being considered a creep or weirdo?
2. If she says no, yes that will hurt. But never taking the chance, that will hurt even more.
3. Get in the mindset of playing to win. Don't get in the mindset of playing not to lose.
4. If you never ask her out, you're going to regret it in the future.
5. Think about all the times you really liked a girl but you were too scared to do anything about it and you let her walk away. You don't want to make the same mistake.
6. Don't put her on a pedestal. She's a human being too.
7. If you're scared of creeping her out, that's okay too.
Are There Any Women You Know Currently?
Are there any women that you know currently who are single and that you're potentially interested in? Write down a list of girls you know that you potentially like for instance
-Girls you went to school with
-Girls you go to/went to work with
-Any girl who's a friend or a friend of friend
You could always shoot them a message on Facebook, Snapchat, Twitter etc... Try to talk to them, maybe after a week ask them out.
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