Hey love, allow me to take you on a long walk through my mind.
For some time I’ve decided to avoid conversations about faith and spirituality. Well, one reason is I’m never in the mood for people’s reaction to learning my spiritual vibe is different from what they’re used to. Some of the people who matter to me understand how I roll and that I’m okay with. Seeking validation is not my thing so I don’t really care to explain or defend myself to unsolicited critiques. But, I’ve found myself being comfortable enough to talk about anything on Hive, the vibe is just different here and I like it. So, here we go.
My mind is quite the revolutionary, in my own way. I practically went from being a dutiful Christian girl, bound by fear of a supreme god, and the lottery of birth, to someone who is now spiritually free and bound by love and kindness. Now that I think about it, I don’t think it’s because I actually believed in the Christian doctrines back then, because for me to believe I have to first understand which I didn’t. It was majorly because I was good at it. I was a bright kid who could recite several bible passages by heart.
My mom would be so proud during children harvest or bazaar or whatever occasion required some sort of performance and drama.
Anyways, I went from the girl who wanted to please her parents, teachers, uncle, adult figures...(mostly pretending actually), to being someone who exists primarily for herself. I have decided to see myself as a person, a wholesome person worthy of life. I stopped trying to please anyone, I stopped caring about keeping the peace. If I don’t want to do something I simply don’t. If I’m wrong I’ll admit it, I’ll also stop you when try to make me uncomfortable. Everything I do matters including my mistakes. To me it’s all just different phases and series of experiences, it doesn’t get beyond my ability, and if it does then it’s not really my place then.
With the evolution of my mind also came radical changes in my lifestyle. I became more intentional about my existence, took better care of myself, read more, and listened more to my inner heart. I became a better person for it, I relate with people respectfully and don’t try to cross their boundaries. I decided my first instinct towards anyone be love. I see myself as a person with thoughts, opinions and culture and I extend that to others too. By seeing myself I automatically see you too.
Now that is my spirituality, honoring myself and my neighbor. Most importantly, I started questioning a lot of things. Things that never came close to making sense which I endured because ‘I can’t question god’.
My spirituality continued to grow when I started to open up my mind. I realized there’s way more than I’m being told. One day I watched a YouTube video and the conversation resonated with me and I started asking myself questions and finding out more about the higher state of my being. It was at this point that I stopped being a Christian because I couldn’t relate at all, it was draining me because I was forcing it. I realized I was part of a system that discriminates and manipulate people, enforced the patriarchy and displayed misogynistic attributes; with a whole book of rules dedicated to the course.
I realized I was part of a system which didn’t care about me, nor regarded my existence as a woman, and that’s just one in countless instances of other forms of manipulation and stifling. I needed a break and a fresh perspective. No shade, just recounting my experience.
I delved more into the knowledge of my ancestors and other forces, I learnt more about my Chi, about Uwa- life, existence, the oneness of the universe. It felt so right, like I was simply learning more about myself, it felt so organic and resonating. I pretty much realized that I’m one with everything. So I stuck with Igbo spirituality known as ODINANI OR ODINALI OR ODINALA. It’s all the same Judy different in native tongues.
ODINANI NDI IGBO - SPIRITUAL PRACTICE OF THE IGBO PEOPLE.
This might sound cliche but my spirituality is rooted in the power of self. I generally don’t do boxes and labels, but I identify with Odinani as my spirituality. Odinani is the indigenous spiritual practice of ndi Igbo(Igbo people) of south eastern Nigeria, one I’m very proud to be a part of.
Let me tell you a bit about Odinani.
It’s is a spiritual practice which differs amongst different Igbo people. Odinani is both polytheistic and pantheistic in nature. Such that there are several gods and deities. It is also pantheist because every facet is rooted or connected to nature, natural elements. While some part of the Igbos believe in the existence of a top deity known as Chinékè as the head of other deities, others believe in their personal Chi as the beginning of their faith but also in the other deities. Chúkwù or Chinékè are likened to the Christian God. Chukwu literally means Big God, while Chineke means the god who creates. They’re both used to refer to God.
Chí is a personal and unique God to everyone,it is the highest state of one’s being and uniquely assigned at birth. Just like the early NFTs everyone is unique to the bearer. Your Chi is in charge of your destiny and the way your life pans out. It is very important to feel connected to your Chi, to be one with your Chi. My personal experience is that my Chi is the gateway to the the source, to our highest consciousness. Now here’s where the pantheistic nature of Igbo spirituality plays out, I’m about to introduce you to some of the other gods and deities that exist.
First is Ànì, Àlì or Ànì simply translates to earth or ground, she is the goddess of earth and the symbol of morality. She is regarded as the most important deity in Igbo pantheology. She is responsible for the creation of everything that lives on the earth; the trees, waters, vegetation, food etc are all connected to Ani. We say she’s the giver of life, for if it weren’t for her, we wouldn’t have a place, literally.
She is also the goddess of fertility as well as death. She gives life and receives them when we die as we’re buried in the earth. She is the head of Igbo pantheon and is a feminine spirit. Her agent or symbol is the python - éké and crescent moon.
I love Ani and I always ask her to guide my steps whenever I’m going out, and drive fruitfulness to me. She makes me feel grounded.
Next on the list is Anyanwu which directly means eye of the sun. Anyanwu is the god of the sun. Anyanwu is both masculine and feminine, the god of light, solar and energy. I like to relate Anyanwu to my solar plexus chakra.
Now there’s Amadioha, the god of thunder and lightning. He is the Arusi(deity) of justice. He represents the will of the people. He serves as the expression of justice and wrath in the face of crime and taboos.
The list goes on but I’ll have to stop here.
WHAT DELIGHTS, INSIGHTS AND JOYS HAVE I DISCOVERED?
One thing I find delightful about Odinani is how realistic and relatable it is to me. It teaches me that all elements are spirits and forces in itself and that has influenced my relationship with nature. Which means I can relate it with other beliefs that resonate with me. With my Odinani there’s no limiting myself.
I found myself relating with nature, the universe on a personal level. I fell in love with the moon, the stars and oneness of all our existence.
A big part of Odinani involves honoring our ancestors and acknowledging the roles they’ve played in the past and counting on them to keep looking out for us on the other side. It means having spirit guides looking out for you, which makes me feel less alone on my journey.
An INSIGHT I’ve discovered is Odinani has taught me the importance self autonomy. Of being original and authentic just like my Chi. Odinani is the practice of the collective igbos but it is also very personal. It has taught me tolerance and respect for people who believe differently from me. There’s no us and them; we’re all the same.
Most importantly, I’ve learnt to do what works for me on my own terms. I have a loving and cordial relationship with the friendly forces I’ve chosen to surround myself with. Unlike the faith I formerly identified with, there’s no fear of them. I do not fear them nor do I owe them worship or reverence. I recognize and acknowledge their presence and impact in my life, I love and respect them and they let me know it is mutual.
It also brought me joy because I’ve learned that "IN LOVE, THERE IS NO FEAR."
The relationship I have with My Chi and my other friendly forces is exactly what it is supposed to be. There is ease, fondness and trust of kinship. And that brings me so much joy.
And I know what to expect because if there's anything I can be certain of in love, it is that love desires to give, share and take care.
Ultimately, my spirituality lies in my heart and hands. I call the shots because this life is mine and that brings me so much peace.
ARE WOMEN MORE SPIRITUAL THAN MEN?
Well, I’ll have to disagree with this from a particular context.
I believe everyone has equal capacity to connect with their faith on whatever level they please. I heard the above assertion a lot when I was in the Christian setting, men would claim women were more spiritual than men just so they don’t have to bear the spiritual responsibilities of the household. That way they indirectly keep women tied and committed to several spiritual practice and prayer warfares. Then in churches, you’d hardly see women in positions of authorities, even a certain bible passage condemns women from being leaders in church.
But I guess I might just be limiting it to a certain context.
From a different perspective, women tend to be more in touch with their higher and better selfs and that would mean being more connected spirituality.
A lot people raise their brows at me when I tell them about my spirituality, I’ve even had a friend call me diabolic but that’s not really my concern. I just do my thing and encourage everyone to do what works for them.
Hello 
Thank you so much for reading.
All pictures used are mine created with Canva.