Family, friends, and the stranger at the grocery store - they all want to know why our kids aren’t in school. I never know where to begin because the truth is, we have over 100 reasons why we will not send our kids to school.
I’ll follow this post with some specific examples - anecdotes and observations my friends and my daughter’s friends have shared with me along with some more personal anecdotes from school. For now, and with school starting up again soon, let’s have some fun listing all the wonderful reasons not to send your kids to school!
- Flexibility
- Stay up late! Yes, you can stay up to watch the stars, a movie, hang out longer with a friend.
- Lazy mornings. Let me finish this coffee and read my emails before we make pancakes and eggs for everyone. Then go ahead and play that video game you kept talking about in your ten minute shower.
- More sleep!
- Off-season travel. Family travel is not just for two months of ‘summer,’ winter break, (and if you’re lucky) mid-winter break, and spring break.
- You can live almost anywhere.
- Ability to avoid most traffic.
- Ability to avoid long lines.
- Ability to avoid the crowds.
- Opportunity to say ‘yes’ (‘sure!’ ‘why not?’) more to your kids.
- Most teachable moments happen at the most ‘inopportune’ time, but parents who are not constantly rushing (themselves or their kids) have the ability to indulge little one’s curiosities.
- Children who are not in school are not required to view all adults as ‘authority’ and all children as ‘less than.’
- Children do not have to ‘socialize’ with children of the same age and same socio-economic status.
- Children can have voluntary relationships with people. They don’t have to put up with bullies, mean teachers, unfair administrators or bus drivers.
- No arbitrary rules.
- No dangerous school buses. (Isn’t it odd that schools always tout safety of children - except when it comes to tossing them in a 22,000 pound vehicle hurtling down the road at 40 miles per hour?)
- Kids can figure out what they want to do sooner in life.
- Kids can pursue their dreams and passions more easily because they have time.
- Kids don’t have to do ‘busywork.’ Have you ever been in a job where it felt like you were just getting thrown busywork to fill out a 40-hour work week? That is exactly what is happening to school kids and without school.
- Kids don’t really like school. Let’s face it, most people are not ‘good at’ school. The very few who love school never leave - they go on to be teachers, professors, and $200K in-debt graduate students with no ‘real life’ experience.
- No mandatory vaccines or jumping through hoops to fill out an exemption form.
- You don’t have to be concerned that your 12 year-old daughter has unwittingly consented to an HPV vaccine without your knowledge or consent.
- Restroom breaks at home are not questioned. Have to go to the potty? GO! Don’t let me stand in your way!
- Kids can eat whenever they’re hungry!
- Kids who are not in school don’t have to raise their hands and patiently wait to be called on. They can freely ask their folks - or other people - questions.
- Kids can wear whatever they want! Pajamas all day long? You bet!
- Messy hair? Don’t care!
- Avoid ‘back-to-school’ shopping madness.
- No fundraisers, no buying tissues for the classroom or other supplies.
- Kids are healthier outside of school. They get more fresh air and their immune systems are stronger.
- Outside of school, your child will not likely fit the characteristics of ADD/ADHD
- With school shootings, drugs, and fights - school is not a safe environment.
- No conditioning children with drills for school shootings or nuclear bombs.
- Children in school are extrinsically motivated, outside of school they rely on their intrinsic motivations to guide them.
- Your kids can learn math in a way that makes sense to them.
- Your kids can learn to read in their own timing.
- Kids can graduate earlier, if they want.
- Kids don’t have the social pressure to keep up with fashion which sets them up to consume less.
- Kids at school are taught from old, outdated books, learning on computers that are not up-to-date, and learning material that is out-of-date.
- Kids in school are not being set up for the future, only the present and past.
- Teachers and administrators are not looking at the individual children, but children as a collective.
- Parents are better equipped to meet the needs of each individual child.
- Kids in school are taught by strangers and spend most of their time with people that parents do not have a relationship with.
- Being out of school strengthens sibling bonds too.
- Kids learn best when they are taught by someone with whom they have a meaningful connection.
- Kids who are not in school are able to maintain a healthy attachment to their parents, not their peers.
- Kids who spend more time with their parents model their behavior, not peers.
- Families get to spend the best parts of their days together - not the ‘leftovers,’ when everyone is stressed out, tired, and grumpy.
- Freedom to live anywhere without having to fill out a bunch of paperwork enrolling and unenrolling students
- No fighting or tears over homework.
- You don’t have to worry that your special needs child is locked in a padded closet all day without your knowledge.
- By turning your children over to the State, you’re giving them an ‘in’ to your lives.
- Children can learn at their own pace and in their own timing based on their needs, desires, and abilities.
- We become better parents when we are with our children more. Our patience grows, we read more about child development, and we respond better to our children’s needs.
- Parents who spend more time with their children notice their children’s patterns and pick up more easily on changes.
- Kids shouldn’t have to ‘pledge allegiance’ to anything they don’t understand.
- You can teach kids your family’s values - not the school’s.
- Many people are delighted to see children out during the day.
- Kids who are not in school are learning through experiences.
- Kids are able to use and practice hands-on practical life skills every single day.
- You can learn right alongside your children.
- Kids who in school are learning ‘fake,’ or fabricated, history. Why are schools still teaching that ‘Columbus discovered America’?
- Kids who are taught at home have more access to more information. They can check out Youtube all day long, ask Siri questions, and pick up any book they can get their hands on.
- Sunny and warm in February? Kids can go outside and play all day long, if they desire.
- No need to write a note to ‘excuse’ a child’s absence.
- No truancy officer will show up at your door if you’ve forgotten to write a note or your child has missed ‘too many’ days of school.
- If your child is sick, he can stay in bed all day without missing much or fear getting in trouble.
- No competition for teacher gifts, PTA, or volunteering in a classroom.
- Your child’s favorite days don’t have to be the few times a year they get to go on a field trip.
- Kids can spend more time learning art and music than they would be able to in school.
- No standardized tests!
- No detention or other punishments for being late or skipping class.
- Children don’t need to be shamed or punished for talking because they’re chatty, not saying ‘please’ and ‘thank you,’ or for talking out of turn.
- Children shouldn’t be forced to perform for adults - or other students.
- Weekends aren’t for cramming in all the fun activities, obligations, and errands.
- Your children don’t have to have labels assigned to them.
- No report cards!
- Your child can run around on all fours all day long pretending to be a dog, without any judgment.
- You will never be able to change the school system.
- Children People do not thrive sitting in a chair at a desk for most of the day.
- Lunch can be reheated leftovers.
- You get to be present for, and enjoy, the moment your child learns something new or connects the dots.
- When your child is having a rough day, you can be right there with a hug and a big dose of empathy.
- Kids can learn responsibility much more quickly at home.
- Kids can do help out with day-to-day chores and can also be paid for other duties around the house.
- At home, kids can negotiate with their parents and siblings.
- At home, kids can bounce around from ‘subject’ to ‘subject’ as they please.
- Sometimes a middle-of-the-day dance party or wrestling session is just what a kid (and parent) needs!
- Older kids can help and teach younger kids.
- Kids learn about money and how to budget earlier.
- Kids who are not forced to take tests, get better grades, compete with other school kids, and are not bullied are less stressed.
- Stress damages memory and executive function. Children who are less stressed can learn better.
- Kids can have more autonomy and develop self-ownership/self-governance.
- Naps.
- Parents can be present for the best - and worst - parts of their children’s day.
- Almost everything can become a ‘family project.’
- Endless opportunities to learn.
- A child shouldn’t be punished for fashioning a stick or pop-tart into a ‘weapon.’
- Kids can connect to nature, which is critical to brain development.
- More freedom for you and for your kids.
After completing this list, I asked my six year-old daughter why kids shouldn’t be in school - here’s her short list:
- Because they (kids) are precious.
- They don’t like it.
- Kids love their folks and want to be near to them.
- You can yell into a fan all day.
What are some reasons on your list? What are some reasons I have left off this list that you’d like to see on here? Disagree with what’s on this list? Tell me about it! Still not convinced to take your kids out of school, why not?