That's what it is meant to do. The smell and the air around it are meant to quell your pains and sorrows, not poke needles into your already sour wound.
Surely, there are things that would exhaust you in this world but not to the point of breakdown. For me, there are days where I need to cook a lot, clean, do laundry, go grocery shopping, arrange and rearrange, and that!
That can get super exhausting, but when you look at the things you've done so far. See how your refrigerator is filled with different delicacies, see your home shiny, your laundry basket empty, your shelves filled with your favorite snack and chocolate bar, there's this sort of happiness and deep sigh that just radiates off you.
You'd feel contented, not conflicted, and that's something worth getting exhausted for. But when you are in a situation where at the end of exhausting your cells, you get slapped hard in the face, pinched in the butt and peppered in the eyes, it shakens you to the very core.
It is also with work and friendship then, life. For an artist, getting to add the final touch to their piece of artwork is superb! It gets them ebullient to begin with another canvas, and so it is with friendship. When you put a lot into your friends- you are with them, remember things very dear to them, I don't know for you, but for me, there's a lot of beauty attached to that.
Being part of someone else's life is a very nice feeling until it isn't when it turns out you are the only one pouring in everything. It can get exhausting in such a way that will break your heart. I believe true friendship is supposed to nourish you. Add beauty to your life, not dim your light.
Just like a gardener would sing to his/her flowers, water them, and put them in a place where there's sunlight. Watching the plant grow gives you a sense of fulfilment like you've done something huge, and it is! Taking care of things or someone isn't an easy task. It is hard, and that is why people say parenting isn't an easy job.
But the beauty of it is watching your children living a good life. Seeing them happy doing what they love makes you look back at those nights and mornings where you couldn't sleep because they are sick, crying nonstop or in pain, and... you get to smile.
If you are giving your all to something or someone, I believe it is meant to nourish us, not exhaust to the point we don't even get to see the beauty that lies in it.
I have been with people who are manipulative takers. You give your all, and they not just take but manipulate you in return, and that can be painful. If you are in a relationship or a place in life where you don't find deep comfort, know that you have a choice. You may feel like if you leave, there won't be any place to turn to, and that's where you are wrong. As long as you are determined and know what you want, you can leave because you never know what lies await until you take a step forward.
Truly, sometimes, things don't work out immediately... even for a long while, and you might blame yourself for leaving despite being in a place where your mental health is taken for granted. But, if you just wait and continue doing what you do best, learning and relearning, you'd find out that leaving was the best option you had all along.
Still yours truly,
Balikis.
Thanks for reading.
Peace be unto those who crave it and more to those who chase it away.