It was hard to get into gear. A long night, short sleep, and overall exhaustion. But the prospect of the day was excellent – going to my favorite place in the Intag valley with Ellie, Kami and friends of theirs. They were supposed to organize everything, but of course didn’t, so I ended up arranging the last few things before we took off. The closer we got, the further down into the valley, the more my mood lightened up.
It became a great day. We chilled in the pool, Kami and I did some wrestling in the water which was fun and also great as she’s getting more and more comfortable with me, playing around, being more open and more herself with confidence when I’m around. I think she feels that I’m there for her, after the last weeks, going to the failed party and to the deposition with her, as well as taking self-defense classes together.
We even got a campfire in the evening. I played around with my camera a little, but it wasn’t easy to beat the automation mode.
There was a sadness inside me all day. It’s becoming more notable now, and I’m doing my best to welcome it, to feel it fully, and not suppress it or shove it into the back of my head to ignore it until it bursts out explosively one day. I learned that much.
I didn’t write the diary yesterday, just a music post on my main blog. So, this is from the 3rd of May about the 2nd of May. And I’m going back to the pool now. Have a great day!
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