Hug Them Little Tighter While They Are Alive...
My beloved friend lost a family member last week and this loss put us on deep grieving.
The loss of a loved one is an incredibly stressful, life-altering experience that most of us will have to face at some point in our lives, and probably more than once. Many of you are no doubt already familiar with the complicated, difficult emotions that come with grieving the loss of a loved one, including sadness, frustration, anxiety, guilt, and even anger.
What many people don’t acknowledge, however, is the physical toll that grief can take on the body.
However, bereavement is one of the most stressful experiences we can have, and stress impacts more than just our minds. Grief is often accompanied by stress responses like changes in appetite, fatigue, sleep problems, muscle tension, digestive issues, and headaches.
If you’re grieving and you feel rotten, physically, you’re not imagining things, or are you just letting your emotions get to you. Your body is grieving, too.
There’s no easy fix for getting over the loss of a loved one. It’s a pain that will lessen with time, but it may never fully go away. Know that whatever you’re experiencing — emotionally, mentally, or physically — is a natural part of the grieving process, and try to be patient and take care of yourself as you go through it.
We often use terms like “heartache” or “heartbreak” to describe intense feelings of loss and sadness, but it turns out that these words are more than metaphorical: grief does physically affect our hearts.
A study found that,
In the day following the loss of a loved one, mourners’ are 21 more times likely to have a heart attack than normal.
People who lose a loved one usually don't want anyone to say anything because there’s nothing you can say that can comfort them because it’s not going to bring them back.
But I do know some things you shouldn’t say such as “She’s in a better place” or “God is just bringing his angel home” or other nonsense like that because it just pisses most grieving people off, which I totally understand because even though you mean well all those phrases are really insensitive, because there’s no other place that person wants is to have their loved one alive and well by their side and are literally questioning God or the universe why they had to die so soon in the first place, so thus it just hurts them more.
But there is something you can say that could be helpful which to let them know you’re there for them during this time. Like just be their shoulder to cry on if they want it, keep your distance if they want to be alone. However, make sure they take care of themselves properly and help them out in other ways of their life because depending on the grieving process your friend conveys then she won’t be able to do much of anything for a while, so you could bring her food, clean up around her house, do errands for her, and etc.
I'd like to add another perspective, some people when losing a parent at an earlier age than expected, they will be so stumped by the loss they won't even be able to process what has happened to them.
I have some attributes to my dear friend in honor of her mother from BiGgy
I’ll try to laugh as much as I can tomorrow, in her honor.
So much love to you between the chuckles.
In memory of your mother, I will plant a tree in our backyard tomorrow.
In honor of her and your relationship with her, I will take my mom out and have a long overdue heart to heart with her, to let her know how much she means to me and to tell her that I know how much she has given in order for me to be where I am.
I’ll honor you and your Mom today by channeling your boundless energy and friendliness.
I’m sorry to hear of her passing and will do my best to live life to the fullest in her honor.
To honor her, I will spend time tonight thinking about how I can be a better person for the people I love.
Dear friend we didn't know her, but we know you and your enormous love for life.
May she rest in peace.
Blessings to you and family❤️
Poem for your mom from we your friend
DO NOT STAND AT MY GRAVE AND WEEP
Do not stand at my grave and weep;
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there, I did not die ❤️