Looking back at faded family photographs of the 1950s and 60s, most of them are of large extended family gatherings – Christmases and summer holidays - with aunts and uncles and cousins all sharing in the fun together. Christmas hats tilted and glasses of sherry on the table.
Absent from these photographs are a much older generation and like me, my parents didn´t really know their grandparents. Only my great-grandmother Isabella, who lived to be nearly 100 and who eventually went to live with an aunt in Oxford.
These days it´s is common for people to live well into their 80s, with more than 15% of the population currently aged 65 or over, this figure is steadily rising. My generation, now in their 30s and 40s, are faced with a dilemma: How best to help our parents, support our own children, survive financially and still have some kind of meaningful life of our own?
My parents, I am pleased to say made an intelligent decision in their 50s. They downsized to a much smaller house in a market town with most amenities within walking distance. What they didn´t plan for was my father dying and my mother, who had polio as a child, gradually needing more help and eventually becoming wheelchair bound. Now in her late 70s she is unable to live by herself, although strongly independent by nature.
In the age of recession, social help is limited and comes with a price. You can get it only in the most extreme situations and it is often farmed out to agencies who send a difference person every time the wind changes. Help with anything outside the house, like hospital visits, involves hours of organisation and the vulnerable person left waiting like luggage for available transport.
It is therefore not surprising that almost 10% of the population in the UK are now caring for one or more family member and this figure is set to rise. Like them, I am also taking on this challenge and am pleased to say that sherry is one of my most favourite drinks.
Photo credit: Wpengine.com
Sources
https://www.carersuk.org/for-professionals/policy/policy-library/facts-about-carers-2015
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demography_of_the_United_Kingdom#Age_structure
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