What is the emotional cost of staying in Venezuela? The country has been erased before the eyes of its inhabitants. The "Antiparabolic" citizen is giving way to the citizen of the complaint. In a nation where the affections are gone, those who are still here suffer the same symptoms of the migratory duel. The psychologist Meury Rivero leads an accompaniment group for those who have decided to stay "holding the peel", with sadness on the slopes
"Venezuelan migration has a high emotional content that is not being addressed," warns Meury Rivero, a psychologist at the Universidad Central de Venezuela and coordinator of an accompaniment group for relatives of people who have left the country. Today, Venezuelans understand, from their own experience, the migratory duel.
See splitting children has given way to empty nest syndrome that now suffer Venezuelan parents and grandparents
According to this specialist, Venezuelans who decide to leave spend time – at least, some of them – to organize economically and legally. But the emotional element is left to one side because, faced with the despair of leaving, they consider it of lesser importance. It's the red balance of this diaspora.
"In the current conditions, the Venezuelan is not migrating but fleeing." This is how Rivero evaluates it: "He who migrates, plans, knows he will write a new chapter of his life and understands that he will face hard times. On the other hand, whoever flees is interested in safeguarding life and, in my experience, that is predominating in the Venezuelan. "
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It is a flight caused by stress, anxiety and a fear that surpasses them. A decision moved by instinct. "You are in front of a lion and do not plan or think about what will be the best way out. No! You go anywhere, because what you're interested in is surviving. That's the difference with the migratory process. "
The problem, according to Rivero, is that in being forced to leave the country of origin, the Venezuelan has begun to develop the syndrome of Ulysses, the man banished and away from his affections.
These traits are accentuated in some Arab refugee population in Spain that faces chronic sufferings of anxiety, stress and depression, precisely derived from tax displacements.
"Venezuelans who go away feel that they have no place to go back to, that they are kicking out of their country, different from the migrant who does know where to return."
But, what happens to the one who stays
The migratory duel experienced by Venezuelans has two faces, that of those who left and also those who stayed. Both are united by the feeling of loss and, consequently, by weeping.
"Who stays in the country, but his family is gone, goes through the same duel. Life has changed him even if he continues in Venezuela, "defines the psychologist Meury Rivero.
"His affections are not complete, the routines have changed and even feel selfish because they can not avoid sadness despite knowing that this family is in more favorable conditions in a different country."
What happens in many cases, says Rivero, is that people – especially parents and grandparents – connect with what psychology calls Empty nest syndrome, that is, their homes have been uninhabited, a reality that has become widespread in different Areas of Venezuelan life.
Rivero says that "when workers come to their offices what they see around them is the absence of companions."
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Indeed, in Venezuela there are daily labor disincorporations. Citizens who go on trips forced by the political and socioeconomic context. "I have had to go and give lectures in different companies because discouragement has a negative impact on the productivity of work."
There is sadness in the environment
The country has been wiped out in front of the Venezuelan's eyes. "People feel that they are in a place they don't know," the psychologist analyses: "There are friends, the neighbors are gone and the reality that I have now is not the one I know how to handle. In the bakery there is no bread, in the supply there is no rice. The Venezuelan feels that this place is the non-place. "
"The same Venezuelan is feeling that it is not so cool," says Meury Rivero: "We do not wake up with laughter but with complaints."
So it has become common to hear ´ and I have no one in the country ´, ´ in my building were almost all, even complete families ´.
The same situation of abandonment of the spaces is raised in the educational institutions. "There are migratory duels in schools. The number of students has decreased. In halls where 30 students started, there are now 15. Children and adolescents resent and there are no boarding tools. "
Meury Rivero tells of experiences of parents who feel guilt because among his plans he is not leaving the country, but his children make claims about how it may be possible that they are still in Venezuela if all his friends have left.
"Many young people lead reproaches to their parents with questions like: ´ are we going to stay and turn off the light with Diosdado? ´ What I mean is that the duel is present in our dynamics."
This psychologist, who has learned from the experience to emotionally advise the migratory duel, recalls that Venezuela had no culture to leave the country. Tourism was carried out mainly within the borders. Margarita, Mérida, Gran Sabana, among others, were common destinations. So, migrating constitutes an unprecedented demographic manifestation. And the consequences of this fragmentation are even seen in the use of social networks.
Family ties have been redefined. It is common, for example, that the divided Venezuelan family celebrate birthday parties through video calls. or attend weddings on a virtual basis through live features that operate on social networks.
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There is urgency in the Venezuelan for being informed and the older people have understood. So much so that they have assimilated the complexity of some technological devices.
Meury Rivero faces every 15 days to the state of sadness of a group of people made up of adults who are looking for arguments to alleviate the absences left by a relative who has left. It is a group that is offered for free.
"The idea is for people to contact their emotions, to feel that there is a place where they are listened to without prosecution and that channeled their feelings to avoid depression. Those who come here are in the process of mourning and the trigger has been the migratory issue. "
To take into account
For those who stay in Venezuela it is necessary to accept that it is valid to feel sad before the mourning to dismiss the affections.
That does not mean that the one who stays is not happy with the achievements of those who left. But recognizing emotions is healthy.
It is valuable to connect with vital activities. Listening to music, preferably Venezuelan, has a reaffirming effect.
You have to live in Venezuela, exercise any stimulating activity. Incorporating knowledge is an option.
It's not worth it to shut up and cry at home.
Author: Néstor Luis Llabanero
Digital media: http://www.caraotadigital.net/investigacion/el-venezolano-no-esta-migrando-esta-huyendo/