Growing up in Switzerland, I've very much adopted a swiss mentality. Being on time, following rules, focuse on doing things good and right, having a strong working mentality and on and on. At the same time it all was not my true nature.
Only in 2010, when I got the chance to visit Guyana (in South America) with my mom – the country where she grew up – I began to understand where I really came from and where my roots lay. I found myself midst of the guyanese jungle, surrounded by trees and sounds of wild birds and monkeys. Wrapped in the warm humidity, my skin was soft and I could see small driplets of sweat drop from my skin. Life there was slower. Having only 5 hours of electricity a day, made life more primitive and in a good way. I learned to appreciate the simple joys of life. Watching my mother interacting with the native people, relatives and old friends, I finally got to understand who my mother was. I saw a new person infront of me, one, that was home again.
She grew up in a very small town called Mabaruma. Being the third child out of 14 you'd imagine, that her life hasn't been that easy. At that time of course, there was no electricity at all. To be able to go to school, she'd have to ride her horse (without saddle) for miles. When I picture this story, I always see a native indian. And indeed, this is, where our family comes from. From the native indian tribe the Arawaks, also called Tainos.
My mother told me stories about their traditional rituals they used to celebrate. She told me about her deep bonding relationship to her grandfather, who was the elder of the tribe. When he died, her grandmother was the only one left with the knowledge about the original Arawak traditions. She teached young children arawak songs and dances, hoping to keep the dying culture alive.
In those three weeks, I have found another part of my origin. It is the part, that was missing during all my life, to feel whole. It is the part where I find my home. Since then, I have a different relationship to plants and to nature in general. Forests have become my vision of a home. And this is, why I find myself living out of the city now. Not in a forest yet, but in a small village surrounded by trees. But I'm still young and I haven't given up my plan, to have a little house in the midst of the forest and build my home.