For a long time, I received many signals that I was living in an accelerated way. I thought that some practices I was doing were saving me stress and money, but on the contrary, these practices were causing me a lot of anxiety. What was I doing wrong? That was one of the questions I asked myself, and so I started to be aware of what was happening to me.
Our childhood experiences and our family environment mark the way we conceive our surroundings and future. For many reasons that are not relevant to detail, my mother was always a woman of foresight. She always acted based on being prepared "just in case". It was something I learned, and when I became an adult, I took this characteristic of "being foresighted" to the limit and became a prepper.
Preppers are always waiting for something bad to happen, so they become obsessed with being prepared to "survive". It ranges from learning to be self-sustaining (which is not such a bad thing), and the extreme part is becoming compulsive accumulators.
So, after a while, my cupboards were full of food for six months, and so was my medicine inventory. When I opened one package, I would immediately buy three more "to replenish" so that I would never run out. Always waiting for something bad to happen. What was driving all this in me?
Years went by and nothing serious happened. Thus, many foodstuffs expired, as did medicines and other products (batteries, candles, matches, personal hygiene products). The sad thing was to have to throw all this away, and no one would take advantage of it. It was absurd! Many people in need, and I was wasting it! And if we were to look at it, it was a great amount of money that was being kept in the garbage.
The first sign was when the shelves in my house were not enough for storage. What was happening to me? I took some time to reflect on this and discovered that all my actions were motivated by "fear". Fear of something happening, fear of not being able to control my environment and circumstances, fear of uncertainty, fear of losing my loved ones.
The moment I freed myself from fear, everything began to flow harmoniously. Getting rid of the things I accumulated at home "just in case they were needed" was no longer my priority. I began to live more consciously, applying the maxim of one day at a time! So I started consuming all the accumulated food and didn't buy any more until it was gone. My current purchases are more conscious, and I use what is left over in money to enjoy recreational activities with my family. Trips are experiences that do not take up physical space but the good moments remain in the soul.
I still have a long way to go. I don't define myself as a minimalist, but I changed a life of stress and accumulation for a more practical and simple life. I have gotten rid of many objects that served no function in my home. I have fewer things to clean and worry about.
I still have challenges to meet such as donating my recipes books collection and many of the clothes that are still sitting in my closet unused. The more clarity there is in our thoughts, the easier it is to stick with just the basics. I recently got rid of my 15+ year record collection, so I think I'm on the right way.
Will I achieve my long-awaited dream of having what I need to live in a tiny house? We'll see in the meantime, I'm happy with my process of adopting a simple living. I'm not looking to "survive" anymore, I'm just living!
Thanks for reading. See you in next post!