I don't know if there is any other part of the world where women are under such constant and unwavering pressure from peers and family members, to get married and make a family as it is in Nigeria. Combined with this pressure women face is an equally unnatural willingness of the men to remain single for long. As you can see, these are not favourable conditions for the 30-year-old woman that thinks she is overdue to get married.
Mary has been working as a customer service officer in a bank for the past five years, after obtaining her Masters Degree in Business Administration and Management. She has had one promotion and is looking forward to another one this year. We went for a movie last week and she wanted to know why I wasn't married.
'Well I haven't met the right person, I guess. How about you?'
'All the men I meet just want sex', she replied.
I thought about this response for a while. Of course she was right. Men want sex. But they also want someone they will spend the rest of their lives with. Unfortunately, most men's first thought before approaching a woman is sex. Don't get me wrong guys but I don't think we usually think, "She looks like she would be an excellent homemaker. I gotta talk to her".
Our thoughts are usually like in similar format as, "I'm totally hitting that: Look at the rack on her!" But as the proverbial bush rat told her son, "People do not discuss the same topic going to farm as they do on the return trip". It is after the man has been attracted by the "rack" that your job as a woman begins.
Through years of evolution and natural selection men have mastered the art of hunting and walking away with their bounty. By the same means, women have learned to be discerning about certain qualities of the right type of man such as physical strength, stamina, ability to provide for a family, and the probability that he would stick around after knocking you up.
Of course women also like things like rich, tall and handsome but those are just extensions to the basic qualities that women are built to seek out in men by nature. So if he has those qualities then you can show him the other qualities that men look for in women apart from the rack and other physical features. These include decency, ability to bear a child, ability to stick to one man (loyalty), ability to keep a home, and ability to nuture.
If you really pay attention, you will see if he is interested in these features. If he isn't, run. He is not the kind of man you want in your life anyway. But for him to stick around long enough for you to conduct your investigation and showcase your good qualities, you have to hold out on sex for a little bit because not all of us will stick around once we get it: Off to hunt other females we go! And that's the importance of dating. Unfortunately, the hook-up culture is the order of the day.
Thank you for reading.