I don't think anyone could even imagine being on my situation and condition much less to be in my position as it really would put someone in a very dangerous thoughts about dealing with it like suicide or self-harm. Maybe God had seen such a scenario building on me or might develop on my thoughts that is why he gave me this community so that it can help me to handle the situation and possibly serve my purpose in this lifetime.
Thank God that I love blogging and although I only know a fistful of English language with a terrible grammar (Being caught by a grammarnazi once) I already managed to submit many blog posts that told many things from my thoughts in the past months. So I just write to take my mind off from things especially when I do not feel well.
But I am just actually am forced to blog as no one in my relatives are helping me significantly financially but this community changed it all and made my medical needs easier to manage because of the support that I get from my friends here in the background as your upvotes adds life and ease to my hard life.
So I am enjoying the healing now, I do not have that lingering pain that I have before in my back and my face changes too but I hope for the better as well because I could use them now to drink while sitting down. It was such a bonus in my life. Now I am just waiting for a miracle from science and a miracle from God but I don't know what my future holds, I will just have to discover it day by day and write it all in the steem blockchain.