Zen in a Beggar's Life
Tutsui was a well-known Zen teacher of his time. He had lived in numerous temples and taught in three provinces.
The last temple he visited accumulated so many followers that Tutsui told them he was going to quit lecturing entirely. He advised them to disperse and to go wherever they desired. After that he vanished without a trace.
Two years later one of his disciples discovered him living with some beggars under a bridge in Kyoto. He at once implored Tutsui to teach him.
"If you can do as I do for even a couple of days, I might," Tutsui replied.
So the former disciple dressed as a beggar and spent a day with Tutsui. The next day one of the beggars died. Tutsui and his pupil carried the body away at midnight and buried it on a mountainside. After that they returned to stay under the bridge.
Tutsui slept soundly the rest of the night, but the disciple could not sleep. When morning came, Tutsui said: "We do not have to beg food today. Our dead friend has left some over there." But the disciple was unable to eat a single bite of it.
"I have said you could not do as I," concluded Tutsui. "Get out of here and do not bother me again."
dcj commentary The teacher asked the disciple to do as he did for a couple of days. That he could not suggests that his loyalties lie with social conventions that he was not ready to give up.