The second in a collaborative series between myself (mostly story, a little art) and 
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Generally speaking, if your wife is a full fleet admiral and she wants to know exactly how it is that you are close to the family of a princess, you generally tell her what she wants to know, because the princess might survive a lie, but you won't.
Still, I had nothing to hide from Mrs. V.T. Kirk – Admiral Vlarian Triefield, arguably the most powerful military woman in the galaxy – about how we got the invite to Princess Bazelle's coronation … I hadn't told it because only someone who knew me well would even believe it, and, 18 years into marriage was about right. I showed her the picture of my old friend as a child, surrounded for protection in her spectral form by her elemental rings.
“So that's what she really looks like,” my wife said.
“That was 26 years ago, but yes, she is really that huge when not getting into a building to accommodate us human and humanoid type of people,” I said. “The main thing to understand about a child that large; she always was a princess, never a brat, but even a princess has bad days.
“I've always been out of place in the world, along with my best friend Rufus Dixon – we grew up among the farmers in Ohio, and, even in the 23rd century, that class of people is not expected to produce geniuses. But, he and I both finished high school at 16 years old. He's a year older, so, he had gone into practical engineering to get a leg up for us – we wanted to go into space, but we couldn't be bothered with the fleet while there was money to be made, and the money to be made was shipping to all the people who followed the fleet to new portions of the galaxy.”
“Dix and I always intended to start our own company, but we knew we needed experience and contacts, so he put in three years and I put in two, working for other companies and learning the ropes. I thank God daily we survived. I don't need to tell you how dangerous the frontier is because you already know, Admiral, but the main difference is that commercial shippers are generally out there for the money and maybe not up on all the things that would slow that down, like, you know, safety. Dix and I obsess about safety because of all the friends we had that didn't make it home.
“Like Dickens wrote, it was the best of times, and it was the worst of times … a lot of us youngsters talked about if our number was going to come up to die. I tried not to let that get rooted in me or around me, though. The only thing I missed about high school was the sports, so I decided to keep that going – I went to the captains I shipped with and asked if I could organize basketball for when holds were empty, to keep morale up on the long trips to and fro. Most said yes, and were glad to even come to the games and cheer, because it helped them out a lot.
“Captain Julio Morales was the best captain I ever had, and he loved basketball and came and refereed and really took the time to get to know his young crews. He also was the first man to say to me beside my father: 'I know you are not in the fleet like your cousin, but you have the making of a captain, because you are a natural leader and you understand how to inspire people to want to follow you without needing a lot of charisma – energy and drive and good benefits rendered beat charisma every day.'”
“'I played hard and worked even harder, and Capt. Morales trusted me implicitly and gave me more responsibility on board than I normally would have had. Folks became jealous … but then they loved the basketball and other activities, so, balance … and, I kept my high school skills up.
“I remember when that skill maintenance became life or death – our whole ship literally had the fire slapped out of it, passing this system we are now sitting comfortably in. It all came down to what came through the communications line while we were trying to pick ourselves up off the deck on the bridge:
“ 'Daddy won't let me play ball – but I can at least swat these insects always coming through here!'”
I paused because my wife shook her head.
“Oh, that's what was going on,” she said. “A whole lot of commercial ships got swatted that year, I recall, and we had not a clue in the fleet as to what is happening, because the princess here and company don't always materialize in nearer humanoid form, and I'm guessing her flyswatter didn't either.”
“Oh, we got a picture of that flyswatter,” I said.
“We survived the first blow, but the second would have taken us all the way out. However, the comm was open and I shouted out in desperation: 'We're not bugs – we're ballplayers!'”
“Brilliant,” my wife said. “That's what she wanted to learn, although she was young enough so that the metaphor had missed her and she thought it was a real game – that star system governance was a game.”
“Yep. I was 16, and I imagine that in her terms she was maybe 5-6 years behind me – a child with unimaginable power. But that meant she was basically innocent, and, unattended for the moment … sent to her room, and swatting what to her mind were insects coming through the room.”
“Makes you wonder what kind of star-going insects there are in this star system,” the admiral said. “There are some big, bad bugs in the galaxy.”
“Apparently,” I said. “But, the princess was interested in what I had to say.”
“Really? You can play ball? I want to learn! Will you teach me?”
“Sure!” I said. “Just give me a minute and I'll go get my basketball!”
Capt. Morales looked at me like I had lost my mind, but, what other choice did any of us have? The ship was damaged, badly – it was going to take every man but me to keep the engine and hull together, and if we got swatted again, we were done for.”
“ 'Clear the bridge except for Kirk,' ” he ordered, and thus gave me space, on our damaged bridge, to demonstrate the principals of basketball.”
“You were right, Marcus,” my wife said. “If I didn't know you, I wouldn't have believed that. It is hard for a commander in the professional fleet to even think about clearing the bridge in a crisis, but to set up a basketball tournament?”
“Well, look at it this way,” I said. “You know how my Cousin J.T. at around that time reworked the Kobayashi Maru?”
“Oh, okay … well, yes … got to rescue your ship, so you do what was necessary,” she said. “The idea of the test is find the strengths and weaknesses of your command style … but, I suppose you two Kirks took it seriously and so, in very different ways … .”
“Right,” I said. “I just had a basketball to work with, but unlike Cousin J.T., I had to make it work because my ship was the one that needed rescuing.
“Now understand – Her Royal Highness is much, much bigger in spectral form than she is here when us smaller creatures all need to get into a building for a coronation, and even as a child, she was much, much bigger than she appeared today at the coronation. So, I showed up with the basketball, and she had to create an equivalent for herself and just looked around and put her finger into the nearest gas giant planet and took some gas and started making gas balls for herself by using the infinity rings around her head:
"She finally found one she liked –
Art by Deeann D. Mathews, the author
"– and was ready to learn.
“ 'Well, the first thing about a basketball – you need to be able to bounce it,' ” I said, and she made the necessary adjustments.
“Now I don't know how you bounce a ball off the fabric of space-time, but she does, and I wasn't in a position to quibble, so, off I went through the basics of dribbling and all the different offensive and defensive moves there were: fundamental basketball, on a high school level. Then I shared dribble moves on a higher level, including trick moves that you see in street ball going back to the 20th and 21st centuries – all the way back to the And1 era of street ball.”
“Princess Bazelle learned it all – this was literally child's play to her, because she told me that she was being trained to run all kinds of things in the system that her father ruled over that you and I wouldn't let even our eldest Marcia anywhere near for several years. Had she moved over to the consortium we live in, she would have been ready to be at least a commodore with her knowledge of the galaxy and of the systems in it … but still a child in every other way, out here taking basketball classes from a total stranger in a child's trusting way.
“I felt about the princess the way I did about my own little sisters … she wasn't malicious or anything, just a whole lot bigger and stronger and thus more dangerous, but she hadn't meant to cause any harm. Little girls do not tend to like flying insects, after all, and she was no exception except for the fact that she had improvised a flyswatter of her own, and that thing was deadly.
“Meanwhile, in the background, I could hear the computer pinging warnings … the rest of the crew was struggling to save the ship, but I had to help them as best I could, and that was keeping the princess busy. That came to a whole new level when she materialized on the bridge at approximately my size and weight.
“ 'Show me the rest of it! How do the rings work?' ”
“In other words, how is the game actually played – how does it come together – so, I had to show her the principles of one-on-one basketball, with this caveat: 'You're a whole lot stronger than I am, ma'am … if you don't play fair, you could easily kill me.'
“ 'I'll play fair. I like you, and I thank you for showing me basketball. I will come down to exactly your strength.' ”
“So, we went on and totally wrecked the bridge, playing improvised one-on-one. It was a good thing I was 16 then … could jump over consoles and dunk over things. She learned really, really fast, but she was gentle, relatively speaking – physical but not too much, and I did the same for her until she had another realization.
“ 'This would be more fun if the rest of your friends were playing with us!'
“ 'And, we would, but, that swat you gave us was pretty strong, and, we can't live outside the ship like you can, so, they are having to hold the ship together.' ”
“She got the message then – it stopped being a game and she realized what she had done. In a flash, she disappeared from the bridge and reappeared in spectral form, and the comm system recognized one of the most common words in the galaxy:
“ 'DADDY!' ”
His Royal Majesty appeared in spectral form shortly thereafter, and he was not pleased.
“ 'Bazell-ah!'
“That A as in ah was the sigh every parent has given with his or her children betraying their childishness... the A sound represents the acknowledgment of immaturity.”
“How many times have I told you to not interact with any insect that comes near from outside – many of those are starships!”
“ 'I know, Daddy … I'm sorry … I was mad and I forgot.'
“ 'Again. BUT, you did come to me yourself this time, and that shows you are growing, Bazelle/a.'
“That little bit of an E sound … it was already there, indicating a step toward her name today.
“ 'I had no choice – they are really ballplayers inside those things and their ship isn't going to hold together and it's my fault and I need you to save them!'
“ 'Oh, so you didn't understand that when I said you were too young to play ball – well, that is my fault, my daughter, because in some ways you have grown more than I thought, and in some ways less. As for this ship, of course I will fix it like all the others.'
“All at once the lights came back on and hull integrity went back to 100 percent.
“ 'Who is this your new friend the ballplayer – but first, Bazelle/a, put the gas back on the seventh planet. The precession of its equinoxes cannot afford you making five hundred balls out of its gas and then choosing one to play with. If you want to do that, get nebula gas next time. We have plenty of those around.'
“ 'Yes, Daddy, I'll put it back right now.' ”
“And she did, and then introduced me as 'the basketball king' – 'he is the only other being as comfortable with a sphere as you are with moving asteroids and rounding them off, except of course, he has one already rounded off, so he must be a king like you!'
“ 'Greetings, Your Majesty,' I said, and bowed deeply before kneeling down. 'My name is Marcus Aurelius Kirk Jr., and I have the honor of being a crewman upon this ship called the Chupacabra.'
“ 'You see, my daughter – he is a person, in a ship, not a bug,' His Majesty said to his princess.
“ 'I understand now,' she said. “ 'I really do.'
His Majesty addressed himself to me.
“ 'You are very, very young, Crewman Kirk, but you must have a very wise father, and a very wise captain.'
“ 'Yes, Your Majesty, I have both.'
“ 'You are on your way to being both as well,' he said, 'for not only have you saved your ship and crew, you did so by showing kindness to an enemy … by seeing her as someone's child, past what she did not mean to do to you. Thank you for teaching my daughter basketball, and about bodied persons in ships.'
“ 'Oh, you're welcome, Your Majesty.'
“He appeared on the bridge at three times my height, holding his 'little girl' in one mighty arm.
“ 'Give this to your captain for you and your crew, with my apologies, and assurance that this will not happen again.'
“He reached out with his giant hand and divulged a lump of gold the size of a basketball.
“ 'Farewell, and thank you again for being so good and kind to my daughter, even in your distress.'
“ 'Your Majesty, thank you for repairing my ship, and the gold – this will go a long way.'
“The last thing I heard the king say before they disappeared from view was, 'So tell me all about this basketball thing, Bazelle/a.' He reminded me very much of my own father, in that when the trouble was over, it was over, and he got back to loving us.”
“Yep, that is how my father is as well,” my wife said, and then snuggled me. “That's also how you are, and because I saw that tender majesty in you when we met, and in how you treated me when we first met, that's why I knew it was safe for me to fall in love with you and why your children adore you.”
“Thank you, V.T. That means the galaxy to me, to hear you say that, and I'm glad to hear it now, because, you're probably going to be mad at me about the next part … the statute of limitations had to expire before I could even get into how the princess and I met again and had to deal with a sticky situation, and I had to find a Kirkish solution … .”
Come back next week to read more of the Princess Bazelle saga, and if you want to have a piece of this tale for your very own, you had better move -- "Introducing Bazelle" is on NFT Showroom in just ONE EDITION, so GO GET IT if you really want it!