Trying to find motivation to work in a country where everyone struggles and wages/salary really suck.

Hello Steemit Family!!!

I woke up feeling a bit blue today... and I find no explanation why. Been thinking whats wrong with me, I mean... we all have our days. Life can be like a rollercoaster of feelings, one day you feel at the top of the world, the next one you go down and it sucks. And when I feel shitty I normally go back in time, like looking back at my whole life looking for my mistakes, where did I fuck up?. It can be tough to realize what we did wrong, it hurts cos theres no way of going back. You gotta man up and take it as it comes. Learn from experience to avoid doing the same mistakes again.

My situation at the moment is a bit lame. I am almost 30 years old and at the moment I am living at my moms house. And I think that this is what is killing me inside. Of course that I would love to have my own place and feel 100 % independent. But reality is far rom that. When I was 22 I moved to New Zealand where I lived and worked for around four years. I was young, adventurous and with lots of determination. I wanted something and went for it no matter how hard it could seem to be to achieve.

So I lived 4 years in New Zealand, feeling totally independent, I needed help from nobody and it just felt GREAT. After that I traveled a lot around the world, in NZ I could save some money and decided to invest it in traveling. I could have bought a piece of land, or a car, or whatever... but no instead I decided to go traveling to learn from the world and to discover myself. Sometimes I wonder if it was a wise decision... and most of the time I think it was. I mean... material things don´t fill me, but I could have started building a house or something like that.

At the beginning of this year I was living and working in New Zealand, life was good, I was feeling great. Then I get a phone call from my brother telling me that our step father was diagnosed with cancer and that it was pretty bad. So I decided to come back home to support my family in these hard times. And.. here I am. I got home in February and its now mid September and I am still jobless. Why? Are there no opportunities here in Uruguay? Well... there are actually but the pay is so miserable that I can´t deal with it. I am no longer a teenager, when I was 19 I did work for usd 500 a month working 14 hours a day and with no day off. I know it sounds really bad, well... it was. Happens that I studied to be a chef, and it is a profession that is extremely undervalued here in Uruguay. January is the busiest month of the year, therefore it is very common to work the whole month with no day off, and I did.

But since I am almost 30... and I worked abroad, I know what I´m worth and I love myself enough not to sell my soul to the devil for crap money. The thing is that months go by and I am still in the same situation, no job, no income... and I´m starting to feel the pressure. I need to get my shit together asap and find a decent job and get my life going again. I mean... I no longer want to earn decent money, I gave up on that, now my priorities are to work to nice people that at least respect me and treat me as a human being.

Now I have the opportunity to work in a Food Truck with an old friend and her husband. They are the nicest people with good souls and that is the only thing that gives me hopes. I may sound like a whining machine but believe me, the economic situation in Uruguay is crappy as hell. Everything is really expensive, similar to Europe´s capitals, but our income is really low. Working as a Chef earning usd 700 a month is really common. And its not like that money will last forever here, no way!. Struggling is constant, even for people with real professions like doctors and so on... it is hard to make a living here, let alone grow and do well.

So... now I am looking for a place to rent to go living on my own, talking with some friends to rent a house all together and share the rent. Sigh... hopefully things will start going my way, and I can feel independent and free again. So if you live in a comfortable situation, or if the place you live is fair with the wages/salary I would appreciate and thank the universe for it. Not everyone has that luck. Third world countries really do suck when it comes to economy and quality of life.

Sorry for the rant, if it sounds like one. Just needed to get that out of my chest to see if it makes me feel better. Thanks for the support and for reading my words. Best of luck to everyone! And see you guys around! Thanks!!

(all pictures taken by me with my Moto G3 phone)