If you're loved by someone, you're never rejected, decide what to be and GO BE IT
-The Avett brothers
Recommend Reading Introduction to Unproven
DEFINITELY READ Prologue
Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three
Chapter Four Chapter Five Chapter Six
Chapter Seven Chapter Eight Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten Chapter Eleven Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen Chapter Fourteen Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen Chapter Seventeen Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen Chapter Twenty Chapter Twenty One
Chapter Twenty Two Chapter Twenty Three Chapter Twenty Four
Chapter Twenty Five Chapter Twenty Six Chapter Twenty Seven
Chapter Twenty Eight Chapter Twenty Nine Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty One Chapter Thirty Two Chapter Thirty Three
Chapter Thirty Four Chapter Thirty Five Chapter Thirty Six
Chapter Thirty Seven Chapter Thirty EightChapter Thirty Nine
Chapter Forty Chapter Forty One Chapter Forty Two
Chapter Forty Three Chapter Forty Four Chapter Forty Five
Chapter Forty Six Chapter Forty Seven Chapter Forty Eight
Chapter Forty Nine Chapter Fifty Chapter Fifty One
Chapter Fifty Two Chapter Fifty Three Chapter Fifty Four
Chapter Fifty Five Chapter Fifty Six Chapter Fifty Seven
Chapter Fifty Eight Chapter Fifty Nine Chapter Sixty
Chapter Sixty One Chapter Sixty Two Chapter Sixty Three
Chapter Sixty Four Chapter Sixty Five Chapter Sixty Six
Chapter Sixty Seven Chapter Sixty Eight Chapter Sixty Nine
Chapter Seventy One
Grayson flopped down on the hotel bed, alone for once, and smiled. He brought his hands up to examine his knuckles which were cut to shit, opening and closing them, reveling in the pain. He and Jay had gone back to the seedy little bar and it had been a helluva good fight. He grabbed his phone to send his partner in crime a text, and noticed a blinking in the corner of it indicating he had a new e-mail. Probably junk, most people used Facebook or texting to send messages these days, but he clicked on it anyway.
I'm for Ary now.
He sat up and stared at the subject heading, sent from Dori then clicked on it and read the half-page long missive, his throat going dry.
You don't deserve her. So if you're still playing a game or thinking about starting one up again in the future, count me the hell out. You are more fucked up than I am, which is saying something, at least I'm smart enough to recognize something real when it's right in front of me. It's a good thing you have money to buy friends, you wouldn't have any otherwise. You will still be alone in the end. Enjoy your lonely, unhappy life.
He stared at the words in shock, trying to make sense of them coming from the Dori he'd always known. Someone who put no stock in feelings or friendship unless it would benefit her somehow. Someone like himself. There was an attachment beneath the message and he almost deleted it; the message had been enough of a buzz kill. But curiosity got the better of him and he clicked on it instead. It was a recording, and Ary's voice came out loud and clear. You don't have to do that...
At the end of it there was a bit of a pause, then Dori's voice. She doesn't know I did this, only that I blocked you from my phone. But I thought you should hear the response to your despicably cruel and thoughtless breakup from the beautiful soul you threw away so easily.
Gray hurled his phone down on the bed, his earlier elation decimated. That stupid bitch, he thought angrily. What could Aryanne possibly do for her that could even compare to the doors he could open, the opportunities he could present? He jumped off the bed and paced across the room, wishing he'd received this bullshit before the fight, at least he'd have some way of burning it off.
Aww, you've got yourself a real friend now, huh? Bet you'll be regretting this decision when Ary goes running back to her old friends and leaves you high and dry. He stopped in front of the antique vanity and gripped the edges, staring at himself in the mirror. It doesn't matter, you don't need her anymore. Only four months until graduation, and you had no intention of starting anymore of those juvenile games anyway. It's Dori’s loss, not yours.
There was a light knock on his door and he glanced at it. With effort he got himself together and walked over, looking through the peephole. Tabitha. He smiled. Just what he needed. He opened the door and grabbed her, pulling her into the room.
A couple of hours later he lay there with Tabitha snoring beside him, and grabbed his phone off the end table. He plugged in his earphones and replayed the recording, listening to Ary's lilting voice. When it was finished he lay there trembling, still hearing her voice in his head. It's not about deserving, I love him… He'll be the missing piece in my life...I still reacted like the world was coming to an end when I read that message...
He glanced over at the sleeping Tabitha, a wave of disgust washing over him as he noted the way her mouth was slightly open, a strand of hair sucking into her lips every time she noisily breathed in, then blowing back out again moist from her saliva. His skin crawled at the thought of her waking up and reaching for him.
He got out of bed, careful not to disturb her, and threw on some clothes and a coat.
He walked until he found an open convenience store and went in, buying a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. It was the first pack he'd ever purchased. Jay was a smoker, and he occasionally took one from him when they were drinking, but this was the first time he truly understood the appeal. He went back outside and hunched over against the chilly wind, lighting up. He took a long drag and watched as the smoke streamed from his mouth, mixing with his breath. You will still be alone in the end, good luck with your lonely unhappy life. He took another drag, his hand shaking slightly. Bullshit, he thought, I will never be alone. He shied away from the lack of conviction behind the words.
He started down the sidewalk and considered calling Jay, but for the first time since he'd met the guy he questioned whether their friendship was real. After all it was his father who had set them up. Had Jay been paid to hang out with him? He took another drag and blew it out in a stream. Paid to show him a good time? It's a good thing you have money to buy friends, you wouldn't have any otherwise. He threw the smoke on the sidewalk and started walking faster until he was jogging then flat out running, turning corner after corner until he had no idea where he was. He stopped, putting his hands on his knees as he attempted to catch his breath.
"You looking for a good time baby?"
He looked up and the source of the question was a parody of every female he'd been with in the past month. The only difference was that this woman didn’t hide her nature behind designer clothes and an expensive hairstyle. His stomach rolled as he forced himself to stand up straight. I look at my future and know without a doubt that it's infinitely better with him in it. His throat tightened.
"I thought I was," he told the woman in a strained voice. "But I'm beginning to think I left my good time in California."
She cocked her head to the side. "Girlfriend?"
He nodded slowly and said, "Best friend. Only friend," the words catching in his throat and sinking in as he said them.
"Well honey, you know where you need to be then."
He blinked at her, his eyes burning. "Yeah."
She turned away from him, focusing on a car driving slowly toward them.
He watched as the car came to a stop, the woman sauntering over and leaning on the door frame as the window rolled down.
Aryanne, he thought, his heart squeezing painfully, what the fuck have I done? He wanted to call her. He wanted to beam her up so he could wrap his arms around her, so she'd wrap hers around him. So she'd tell him that everything was okay, because he'd believe her. Because he trusted her. He turned and walked away, slowly this time. He had to fix it. He reached in his pocket and pulled out another cigarette, slowing to light it. He took a long drag and let it out slow. He would fix it.
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