Welcome to another round of my musings, today I will explore various topics surrounding relationships and air my views on such subjects.
Love and money
Is there a correlation between love and money? Yes there is, but it is not in the way we think. Some people believe only rich people are entitled to love. Sure a poor person has no business prioritizing fun over his family or loved one's well being, but remember that while hunting for money, don't lose those who matter to you.
Someone once told me that money is the bicycle of the gospel and that is true.But hey! this is not about the gospel, it is about love and money.
I was in a whatsapp group where a discussion on love and money came up and the ladies were of the opinion that a guy must be wealthy before they marry him and they had to "spend" their husband's money.
They equated the amount of money he had to the amount of love he would receive from them and I found it fascinating that these people all believed the same thing.
There was this remarkable young man who was of the opinion that love should not be controlled by money. Naturally they out voiced him and I started to wonder, what happened to the love of old?The kind of love our parents and grand parents shared.
What happened to supporting your man to grow? Now everyone wants a ready made partner which makes marriage lose it's primary functions which are solidification of love and establishment of companionship.
Now it's more of 'money for hand, back for ground' (permit the pidgin), people have forgotten what it means to truly love
and establish themselves. I think I finally fund the answer as to why divorce is getting higher nowadays and there is a rise in the recent trend of baby mamas, it is because the marriage or association was not founded on the right principles.
Vanity
My mother always said if you are beautiful or handsome, bless God,but don't get carried away. This life is filled with all sort of vanity and the truth is we indulge ourselves even a little bit at some point.
We all leave our vanities behind when we leave this world, so why cling to them so desperately in the first place? A billionaire gets tossed into the same earth as the pauper he offered pennies to daily, so why allow something affect you negatively?
A beautiful lady or handsome guy will eventually turn to dust one day, so what's with the pride? For guys and girls, beauty is pain, but do you know that beauty is not just pain, it can cost you pain.
I know of countless young men and women who are beautiful but long for a better half. One can be single and successful, I know that, but truth be told, most people won't normally opt for the life of a single, circumstances force them to adapt.
I have an aunt who lives in Lagos, she is very pretty, but she let it get to her head and it cost her her marriage because she became a pain in the neck. Now she drove her husband into the arms of another woman and she suddenly realized she lost big time because the men who were making her head swell have suddenly left her and there are more beautiful and younger models in the market for them to chase.
All is vanity, if you cannot put down your phone and make time out for that special someone because some people are holding your attention, it might be with that same phone you will see the break up text.Sure it might not hurt at first, but over time, you start to seethe things you miss about that other person.
If you are too big to admit your wrongs, remember that pride is your vanity and it will cost you dearly. The devil goes about like a roaring Lion looking for whom to destroy, guess what, your vanity becomes his tool.
Keeping options open and fidelity
This is one of the leading reasons for break ups in relationship. It's actually common among the ladies but guys are not exempt from it too. You see two people in love and you start to envy that love, wait a minute...look closely, look again and voila, you discover it's not actually a guy and a girl in love, it is more like guy and ten ladies in love or a girl and ten guys in love.
There is a term for that, it is called CHEATING! Some people call it an insurance policy,but even insurance policies fail. Do you know that in a bid to safe guard your heart, you have broken someone's heart or some people's hearts? Imagine such selfishness and wickedness simply because we feel life is all about us.
Karma is twerking at your door, you have to please ten partners, you know you love one most, so why say yes to others? why deceive yourself when you know that you'll end up getting hurt when you are hurting others?
Let's not even get started on the risk of sexually transmitted infections because if you contact, you have started a chain.
Remember that the hearts you would have to break eventually belong to human beings like you and a persistent cheat in a relationship is most likely to be a cheating spouse. You could lose that good one due to your stupidity which you term wisdom.
I will end this point with a quote in pidgin language...
Make I chop him money small, na so ashawo take dey start.
Mr right and Miss perfect
Lol, I will start this with a quote in pidgin as it seems pidgin gives a better effect for quotes...
She nor get yansh, na im make Uncle Ben die single
The meaning of that is because of Uncle Ben's choosy character, he died single. Everyone wants perfection, that match made in heaven, but do you know God will not do for man what man can do for himself? There is no match made in heaven, there are only TWO people willing to make it work at all cost.
Do you know that even the relationships which appear all spic and span have their own cracks which are being patched by the parties involved.
No one is perfect, not even you looking for a perfect one, you just have to decide that making it work and compromising when necessary is the best thing to do.
Being too rigid never helps, remember these words I leave you with...
You can decide to come off your high horse and enjoy love in itself or you can continue in the wrong path and reminiscence about what you once had.
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