The Three Little Pigs

Three days ago, I was on my way to work when I saw 3 little black critters in the road ahead of me. First thought: “great. Kittens. Just what this neighborhood needs, more stinking cats.”

But as I got closer I noticed that what I thought were small kitten-sized critters were actually the size of small dogs. Closer and closer I got, until I realized—holy crap…those aren't kittens! Those are baby pigs!

I immediately called my wife and told her we had three baby pigs walking around at the top of our road. Naturally, she spent at least three minutes laughing at me.

THE HAIR OF THEIR CHINNY CHIN CHIN

Yesterday all three of our dogs were outside, , acting fine, as if nothing was amiss. With no warning, all three dogs go berserk. Alisha and I quickly jump up and start looking toward the road. We heard rustling in the leaves, and at first we assumed it was the neighborhood kitty Jasper chasing some poor squirrel or mouse in the woods. Then Alisha let out a loud gasp and squealed, “It's the pigs!” Lo and behold, there they were...three little black piggies running through the ditch. We hurried across the street and tried to get a closer look. But wild piggies they are—skittish and clearly terrified of humans.

I had to use 10X zoom on my phone to get a photo of them. The quality is terrible. But they took refuge under my neighbor’s boat, and I couldn’t get closer to them without permission to be on his property.

HUFF AND PUFF

Fortunately our neighbor came home while the pigs were still under his boat. We told him about them, so he and his wife helped us give chase. Needless to say, that chase ended with the pigs disappearing in the woods, and the four of us humans sitting in the shade panting like dogs.

Last night around 9 p.m. the neighbor’s wife texted me and said the pigs were asleep in their back yard again. So apparently now our little community has three half-wild pigs running loose in it. No one knows where they came from. No one knows who they belong to. They are cute as can be, and hopefully we can catch them before they turn into five-hundred pound hogs.

All you pig experts on Steemit—any ideas? And no, a thirty-ought-six is not an option. Grrr. . . .