I think my consumer clients can feel that something is brewing regarding quitting my job.
I have been getting many calls lately, more than usual it feels, and I have not picked them up.
I checked my voicemail today and I had 15 messages all asking for help.
I think part of me was thinking that as long as I don't tell them I'm wrapping up the business I would still have the security 'feeling' of a job.
Today I decided that I was being an idiot and I needed to make the decision.
I called them all up 1 by 1 and told them that I'm going to do something else with my life.
Unlike with the termination of the contracts (pure business) with these consumer clients I have relationships going back almost a decade.
The reactions were nice though in the end.
Telling another person that you don't have time to help them anymore after 10 years is sort of like breaking up with someone.
Now, I don't have much experience with breaking up.
Hell, the last time I had to go through that I was 17 and in high school.
But similar feelings came back.
You don't want to do it but you know that you have too.
The reaction from the clients was strangely in line with what I remember..
"But....why don't you want me anymore?"
But without the tears.
In some way that was nice. I must have done something right in all those years.
I, of course, thanked all of them for the work they have provided me within the past 10 years and they all wished me good luck on my new adventure.
And that was that.
In the next couple of weeks, I will be having this conversation many times I think.
I must admit, this part of the plan is having a more emotional toll on me than I would have thought beforehand.
It surely is all becoming more real for me now.
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