There is a strange struggle in knowing exactly what is hurting you, yet reaching for it anyway. We see the patterns that pull us down, the habits that drain our light and leave us feeling empty, and we swear each morning that today will be different. But when the night falls or the stress rises, we find ourselves back in the same loop, caught in a cycle that feels as comfortable as it is destructive. It is an exhausting war between the person we are and the person we desperately want to become.

The Gravity of Ancient Loops

I build a cage with bars I forged myself,

And place my better dreams upon the shelf.

I know the poison that I choose to drink,

Yet stand once more upon the familiar brink.



A heavy chain of minutes, hours, and days,

That binds me to these old, destructive ways.

I see the exit, wide and bright and clear,

But find a safety in the grief I fear.



I’m tired of the promises I break,

Of every shallow, hollow step I take.

Each time I rise, the habit pulls me low,

To paths where nothing beautiful can grow.



It’s like a shadow stitched into my skin,

A battle that I lose before I begin.

I’m stuck in orbits that I didn't choose,

With everything to gain and more to lose.



I scream for silence in a noisy mind,

For strength to leave the wasted years behind.

But here I sit, within the wheel again,

A prisoner to a comfort built on pain.