All We Have is Now
I've been avoiding writing lately.
I have all these thoughts running around in my head and I'm not sure how to get them out in a way that is clear.
They are spinning around so fast and I'm trying to grab onto one, but each one keeps slipping out of my reach.
Or maybe I'm not grasping tightly enough because I'm afraid of what I might find.
Well, anyway, I had a thought that kinda flew out of my head the other day then spun around and it hit me like a ton of bricks.
Then the light bulb of realization showered me with light.
It was something I logically already knew, but perhaps I just realized it emotionally.
Sometimes you can intellectually know something, but it is a type of detached knowledge that isn't ingrained within you.
When I teach piano, I often have to have my students count out loud for a couple months until they internalize the division of rhythm within the beat.
Intellectually they can understand the rhythm, but they aren't feeling it when they are playing.
Once they finally internalize it then they no longer have to count out loud.
Anyway, back to the realization.
I always hear people talking about being in the moment, and I'm always like...
"Yeah, I know, appreciate the present and enjoy it and all that crap....but what about all the important things I have to worry about??"
What I finally internalized the other day is that our lives are just a continuation of Nows.
There is no past. It already happened and it's already gone.
There is no future. The future is not guaranteed and it doesn't exist yet.
All we have is now.
If I'm not enjoying and appreciating my life from moment to moment in the Now, then what is the point of living?
I've spoken before with my favorite philosophical muse, 
Continually dwelling on aspects of the past that create feelings of guilt and unhappiness can cause prolonged depression.
Continually focusing on the future with worry and concern can cause prolonged anxiety.
When I look back on my life I realize that I have not been enjoying the Now because I've been too busy living in the future.
This changes
Now