Being friends with a famous person is the next best thing to being famous. You still get to go to all the best parties meet all the hottest women or men, hand out in an enormous mansion and meet plenty of other famous people. The way I look at it there are only two real downsides to having a famous friend, those are; they’re really hard to get a hold of and the other being that they might be somebody you really despise. But who cares their famous, right?
When your in high school you never know which one of your peers are going to become rich and famous, and its way to hard to stay in touch with every single person. That’s why I have a step by step program which can help a person brown nose their way back into these famous peoples lives without losing your dignity. But before we begin you’ll need a computer with internet, an email address, and a telephone with a phone book handy, access to a payphone, a cell phone and a whole lot of patients. The reason for patients being that famous people have a lot on their hands, and may not get around to responding to you right away at first.
Step 1
The first step you’ll take is to casually send your old famous friend an email simply saying:
“hey wuttup (famous friends name) its (your name) just congratulating you on your new found fame, I always thought you would hit it big, but never that big” all this email is for is to let your famous friend know your still alive, and hopefully help him remember who you are."
*Note how the email doesn’t say anything about your famous friends writing you back.
This is so he/she doesn’t catch on that your just trying to use them, it’s just a friendly hello.
Step 2
Step 2, if it has been over 30 days and still no reply that’s when you open up the phone book and search for their number. Now in most cases famous people’s numbers aren’t listed in the phone book for privacy purposes, so that’s when you call their parents. Hopefully you’ll have already met the famous friend’s parents in the past so they know who you are. Preferably speak to the mother and start with small talk, never jump the gun.
This is a crucial part; ask how your famous friend is doing, when the mother replies:
“oh he’s in this movie, or this T.V. show, etc”
say
“oh my gosh, really? I had no idea”. This lets the mother know that your not just trying to find them because their famous now.
Once she has remembered you and is making some good conversation say
“would you mind giving me (famous friend’s name) number, it’s been so long since we’ve last talked that it should be a crime”.
If everything I said was followed correctly then she should give you the number.
Step 3
Step 3, phoning the famous friend. This is where you would use the payphone, because you may not get a hold of them at first. Using a payphone ensures that your famous friend wont think you some obsessive psycho who phones 100 times. It also ensures that your famous friend will never know whose calling.
Step 4
Step 4, when you get them on the phone. When your famous friend picks up that phone you cannot sound desperate, you have to be cool as a cucumber. Never let them hear doubt in your voice, because famous people can pick that up no problem. Start with a simple exaggerated
“heyyyyy (famous friends name)”
then move on to:
“it’s (your name) how have you been”.
Another crucial part here is don’t mention the email unless your famous friend brings it up, and if he does just say
“Oh, yeah, I was emailing everyone from (your high schools name) just to see how everything’s been going, you’re the only one who never emailed me back so I thought Id give you a phone call”.
At this point hell be feeling a little guilty and at the same time he won’t have the slightest idea about your just trying to use him. Then before you ask him to hang out make sure to bring up all the fun times you two would have had together to remind him of how good of friends you use to be.
When you ask him to hang out sometime and the answer is “No I’m to busy”. Then simply say:
“Then can you come to the reunion I’m having, all the old buddies should be their”.
This technique should definitely work. If you have to resort to the old “I'm having a reunion” technique, then set it up, gather up whomever you can and throw the best party your capable of. After that its all you, charm the famous friend when you see them and make them want to hang out with you again.
If you follow all these steps you’ll be drinking crystal on a private jet with plenty of gorgeous women or men just living it up famous style. Words of caution, do not let any of your friends near your famous friend because they might end up liking your friends better then you.