UFOK ETTE EKPENYONG!!
Comedy in the air, laughter on the cheeks, smiles on all faces, Love at its peak, Happiness rebuilt as the story of Ufok Ette Ekpeyong was told to us... by Itoro E. Ituen.
Ibibio Isongo!
Ette Ekpenyong a very greedy, uncivilized and cannibalistic landlord never reasons rationally.
To him, the definition of perfection is an exemplary duplicate of himself.
Formal education to him, was an advocate of discourtesy for his children and for that reason he limited his children to informal education and informal job activities like fetching of firewood, hunting and house chores and restricted them from any contact with formal education.
Ette Ekpenyong had this attitude of yelling at people in such a way that provokes them.
He had an attitude of scolding his tenants and impeding their legal rights by mandating absurd rules and regulations for implementation. Such rules include:
- Defecating in the toilet just once a day.
- Not permitting visitors to defecate but they can urinate.
- Always living an exemplary life for the children of the landlord to emulate.
- Praying at the peak of your voice every morning to confirm your holiness and sanctity as a Christian.
- Not dressing good or better than the landlord and his household when your rent has expired and yet to be renewed.
- Not cooking food with tempting aroma that could obstruct the breath of the landlord and his household.
- Always keeping the compound clean at all times.
- Before engaging a spouse present them to the landlord for scrutiny...
These irrational arrangements were implemented on a compound with leaking roofs and foundation that is on the brim of collapsing.
A compound with latrine for defecating.
A compound with uneducated and unqualified landlord and household.
Ette Ekpenyong despite all his income from the rent tenants pay, exhausted all his money on getting drunk and would frown, scold and punish the idea of sending his children to school.
Ette Ekpenyong despite all his Income from the rent tenants pay, never for once considered renovating his compound nor fixing the cracks on the walls and the leakage on the roof but would threaten to throw any tenant who complains out and tag them 'NDITO UDUK IKOT' - CHILDREN OF SNAKES.
Ette Ekpenyong would frown and scold MMA KUYAK UNAM 'the palmwine seller' for not having enough drinks for him and that would ruin his mood and entire day!
What a man!
What a man who in this age prefers sending his only son to learn hunting instead of going to school?
What a man prefers his daughter at home practicing house chores she could practice on her leisure time than going to school?
Complaints informing him of the leakage and cracks on the walls agitated his sense of humour as he responded,
Am I the cause of rainfall? Am I God who controls rainfall? Tell God to stop the rain and there will be no leakage!
After all these cruelty and stupidity, a single dirt on the toilet instantly poured out accusations on the tenants as he rewrote the compound rules and regulations as follow:
- No eating of eggs in the compound.
- No having of milk for tea or any meal in the compound.
- No purchase of any equipment without pre-knowledge by the landlord.
- No defecation until the landlord and his household have defecated that day.
- No usage of bathroom until the landlord and his household have bathed that day.
- The toilet and bathroom must be washed 7times daily.
- Payment of house rents shall be done on weekly basis.
- Payment of sanitation fee shall be done on weekly basis.
- All the old rules shall be maintained!
Unable to tolerate his cruel actions and uncivilization, his tenants in fear of the house collapsing on a heavy storm, packed out of the compound and on Ette Ekpenyong and his household's return from an all-night event found the house collapsed and they wept!