Hello Everyone!
A meandering writing schedule, The resource struggle, A cold wind, More rain & The rainwater bucket shuffle!
Alright, I am getting started doing the writing later than I like doing so... and I have been struggling with whether I should just go to sleep... or try to see what all that I can spell out here instead. The idea of going back to sleep almost won out, because even after downing some tea... I was/am still feeling tired, groggy and more than a little irritable.
Since I have not been getting much in the way of deep sleep lately, the 'irritability' makes sense... and I am glad that I can at least see it for what it is and try not get too hung up on it. Most of it, is assuredly a combination of dealing with this foot injury (at a really inconvenient time of year), coping with all the financial stress and of course the constant grapple of not having enough food and water more often than not.
On the flip-side of that, constantly running out of supplies in general... has been a truly annoying (and downright problematic) aspect of this particular adventure. That sort of instability (or just inconsistency) has been one of the most common recurring themes over the previous six hundred odd days... and admittedly trying to constantly solve it has left me in pretty piss poor shape all around.
Being accustomed to hardship and 'being alright' living on very limited finances (meaning as long as my bases are covered I do not really want anything else) is a far cry different than continually grappling with higher priced goods... and whether I have the my ability (or inability) to purchase them when they are needed. The cumulative effect (aside from decreased physical and mental health) has been that my nutrition has suffered... and I often feel fatigued and dehydrated not to mention that of course the anxiety/stress has me feeling more than a little neurotic.
If it were not for the kindness of friends, family and some strangers... I would not have made it this far along... yet that has also added on a whole other layer of stress... because I am having to ask for mutual aid way more than I either 'want to' or am accustomed to doing. What I jokingly call 'digital panhandling' is no way to 'make a living' and while I dislike asking for folks to help... I also know what not asking for help does... and that there are folks that want to help... so I do my best not to overthink it all.
After nearly a decade of sharing content, I know that (for me) there is not much to expect when it comes to making anything even remotely close to a living at doing it... but if I do not do it... I will not even have the pittance that it amounts to. I really do my utmost to avoid thinking on that topic overly much... because in the end, I always wind up crunching the numbers (of time invested versus monthly return) and yeah making one to three dollars for two to four hours of work a day... is 'discouraging' to say the least.
To be clear here, I am more 'stating the facts' than complaining... and am aiming to point out the reality of the situation in regards to what all I have been grappling with of late. After all, I am the one that made the choices in my life that lead me to where I am... doing what I am doing... and as much as I might piss and moan about it along the way I am 'stuck' being a writer!
Anyways, today I continued trying to wrest my sleeping schedule back into shape... and stayed up for most of the day doing a combination of stuff on the computer and stuff outdoors. I also forced myself to stay up long enough, so that when I did go to sleep... it would hopefully be for an extended period of time which as it turns out did not actually work.
Earlier in the day, I tried to hike around a little bit to help tire myself out... but the wind was rather icy, gusting hard and it was so cold outside that it felt like those 'summer like' days we have been having were nothing but a series of fever dreams. During the night before it had also rained a fair amount (at last) and the lingering dampness mixed with the wind and cold... made being outside less than appealing!
The cold actually got me pretty dang good first thing this morning, when I went outside with the dogs... and I literally 'froze in place' and had to 'get a grip on myself' as shivering took me over. Not really being prepared for that upon going out the door in shorts and a light sweater I 'duck walked' (even on my bum foot) back inside and had to bundle up in a jacket to overcome the shivers.
In other news, that recent rain did not produce a whole lot of actual rainfall... even though it rained on and off for hours on end last night and into the wee hours of the morning. When I went around and checked the buckets after dawn, I noticed that (aside from the one I use for collecting drinking water) all the buckets had a heck of a lot of pollen and road dust in them.
I am unsure if I ever mentioned it but when I get a lot of sediment like that (in the rain water collection device) I let the sediment fully settle to the bottom before using the water in them. Once the sediment has all settled, I then pour the water from the buckets into either other buckets that I keep indoors (out of the sun and with lids on them) or into a capped container that I store in a shaded place.
After I get the water from the bucket(s) I then clean the bottom of them out the best that I can... so that the sediment cannot dry out and become difficult to remove later. Basically, I keep the buckets that collect utility water 'setup and ready' (under the eve) so that in case it ever rains I do not miss collecting it... and (like I noted in a previous entry) I only setup the drinking water buckets once it is raining and rained long enough to wash the roof off.
Well, the hour is now super late so I am going to call this entry 'good enough' and get on with the rest of my evening. I hope that everyone is doing well.Ciao for now.

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