We have different types of marriages, from traditional, court, religious, and others as they apply to other continents outside Africa. But for my dear Nigeria, these three are the basic and well-recognised types. All of them have their different values as they apply to the people and the part of Nigeria involved.
As for me, the one I prefer the most is the church wedding, but the fact that it is not as valuable as the traditional marriage makes the traditional become my first choice if I am to choose all of them according to importance and pretence.
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As it is known in Nigeria and, I think, Africa at large, the traditional marriage comes first and is well recognised as the basic and most important type over the other forms of marriage. As it stands, other forms of marriage cannot be done if the traditional one, which includes the payment of dowry, is not done.
The traditional marriage will come first for me because even if I do not want to do it, my parents will not allow that because they are very committed to following the right path. But I have never thought of skipping the traditional marriage, and it will come first for me.
Traditional marriage involves parental blessings and approval of the union, where the man pays a certain amount of money and provides some items from the list demanded by the bride’s family. Normally, in some parts of Nigeria, playing music and cooking food – I mean organising a big party – during the traditional wedding is not a must; that is completely optional, just as it is done in my area. Also, most of the items listed on the requirement list can be adjusted through a plea from the groom's side. These make the traditional marriage very much affordable for anyone who is not financially buoyant. Although, the case is different in the Eastern part of Nigeria, especially Imo State.
When it is time for me to get married, I hope I will be financially buoyant enough to make it a big party. But if there is not enough money, I would just do it low-key and live happily with my wife.
With traditional marriage, one can decide not to proceed with the other types of marriage. They are completely optional, except in cases where they are required, especially when a certificate of marriage is needed for travel purposes. But come to think of it, during the traditional marriage, a certificate is given, but I think it has lesser value compared to the one given in court marriage. This is another big reason people opt for court marriage.
Nevertheless, I am still going on with my traditional marriage, and if there is a need for a stronger certificate of marriage to travel, we will cross that bridge when we get there.
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If I have the money to carry on with other types of marriage after the traditional one, it is definitely going to be the church wedding. This one does not cost much, especially in my church, because we do not pay any dime. What makes it appear big is the party that is attached to it. Yes, I have not seen where a church wedding was done without a party.
Thank You!