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Firstly, put together a birth team that is in line with your visions and goals for this birth. This may be a little difficult depending on your area, but there is usually at least 1 doctor here or there that could fit the bill. Being surrounded by the right people - such as having a well educated partner, a doula, a midwife or supportive OBGYN and nurses can be a make or break difference in your birth experience.
A study of over 700 women done cited negative interactions with birth staff to be the majority of birth trauma causes. Over 66% of participants said the four most common themes included:
- Violation
- Lies or threats
- Disregarding embodied knowledge
- Prioritizing care provider's agenda
Your birth team matters. You don't want to have to fight with staff the whole time you're there to get your way.
It will cause psychological and physiological complications - such as the rise of adrenaline which inhibits oxytocin/beta endorphins that help labour progress. When the mother doesn't feel safe, birth slows down or stops until she can get to a safer place. This is the same in all mammals.
Homebirth with a birth professional is the safest route as cited in this Canadian study, but granted you don't want to have a free birth or a homebirth with a midwife - or can't get a midwife to do a homebirth due to legal bullshit or not having any available to accept you as a client.
If you can, stay the hell out of a hospital or find a birth centre.... But given you are not having a homebirth and instead having a baby in the hospital for whatever reason, here's a couple steps you can take to ensure you don't get jerked around like a slab of meat in the system:
On the admitting forms, scribble out all that bullshit that says docs can do whatever they want to you because they know better and you're just a know nothing child. Many people don't read the forms upon admitting - these forms are designed to say that they're the boss and they take no responsibility because birth is not considered a normal physiological event - this relieves them from practising evidence based medical care. Most of they things they do are not evidence based and you often end up with "thank god the baby is ok".
I'm paraphrasing of course. Initial all changes, and get them to initial if you can too to make sure they know that the malarky about them doing whatever they want is now void.
Put "see birth plan" after you scribble out and initial the bullshit.
On your birth plan, put at the top that you do not consent to care until your birth plan has been read in its entirety.
Put places for signatures of attending staff - its a legally binding contract. They don't sign, they're in the hot seat.
Put what you want in your birth plan, make it extensive. Give wiggle room for emergencies. While birth usually goes fine, like 70-80% of the time fine, there's always that chance an emergency might arise. Hold your plan loosely. Make sure you have plans for interventions in there such as epidural and things too.
You can also put things in there like they shall not do a cervical check unless express consent is given - you feel the need, you can put reasoning why - for example: you have past trauma with rape - and therefore you consider this procedure without consent rape.
Your reasons are your own, they need to respect it regardless - but having things like that in there can help them understand the why.
When you enter the room, slap a piece of paper where its easy to see that says,
"This room is under full commercial liability".
This could be on the door walking in and also on the wall clear and free to see behind the bed.
This lets them know that indeed they are liable for their actions.
(A friend of mine, Bryan Parker told me this when his uncle was under the care of physicians in the hospital. They weren't treating him very good whatsoever. He threw this sign up in his uncles hospital room. After some whispering with the nurses and consult from their lawyer - they went from treating him like garbage to a king. You can find Bryan's group Tactical Sovereignty here.
They won't be so quick to be assholes to you while you give birth to your new precious babe.
And if they are...
Don't be scared to take them to court over it either.
They are public servants.
Theyre there to SERVE you.
Not the other way around.
Period. End of story.