Two years ago my best friend broke up with me....
Before I start describing my experience, I would like to note that this is a story about forgiving someone who never apologized, and loving someone who is not even a part of my world any longer. My life is awesome and I have many great people who are "team krista". I have a great family and I am ridiculously happy. So please, no one feel sad for me. Celebrate everything, even pain teaches us things.
Two years ago my best friend broke up with me, it absolutely broke my heart. I met Laurie in school, when I was 15 years old, so when our friendship ended she had been "my person" for 17 years. We stayed close even in adulthood, I stood up in her wedding, and she held my hand as my middle son was born. She was the person I needed at times when my world was shattering, and the first person I wanted to tell good news to. Her kids lovingly called me "aunt" krista. The end of the friendship was abrupt, and was completely devastating for me. Sometimes, things really do happen to us.
Pain changes people, but it also teaches us things.
The first year without her was rough, I hated 2016. I was randomly sad often. I eventually ended up taking anything that she had gifted me over the years and even things that reminded me of her and boxing it all up. I tried reaching out to her a few times. I thought I deserved some sort of open discussion, I yearned for closure. I kept waiting to get mad, I wanted to be mad at her. It never happened, my heart continued to be sad. I still don't blame her for hurting me, she did what she thought was necessary for her to heal.
She had her own reasons for cutting me out of her life, and it isn't my place to openly discuss them. I did not do anything to cause it to happen, it stemmed from old hurts, that had nothing to do with me. I was sitting here reflecting and wondering if she spared a thought for me today. There have been many times when I have needed her for both my down times and all the ups in the past two years, but per her request I have left her alone. What was is no longer. I am still not mad, but I still miss her. I no longer get randomly sad about it though. I hope that it helped her to heal. I hope that whatever is going on in her life she is ridiculously happy and I hope she still realizes that I love her endlessly.
~krazykrista