The bad news is that there really are specific ways that certain people exercise emotional control over you. The good thing is that you can protect yourself as long as you know how, writes News Manager .
1. An emotional manipulator is always a victim.
Imagine the following situation. You say to the man against you: "It hurts me very much by forgetting my birthday." In reply, however, you will hear: "You saddened me, thinking that I would forget your birthday, I had to tell you how much stress I was in, but I did not want to burden you, but you were right - I had to leave set off your problems and think only about your birthday. "" Excuse me. " There is nothing more to say. You have heard the word "Excuse me" and even something in you suggests that the apology is not sincere, there is nothing to do. What's more - now you feel guilty and selfish because you think "just for yourself". And suddenly you start to comfort the other. You are pacifying that everything will be fine. You say your birthday is not that important - many more are ahead ...
They manipulate you, do not you realize? Listen to your intuition . If she tells you that the other is trying to get away by transferring the ball to you, just do not take it. Because at the moment you do it, it will repeat itself again and again ... Once you find out how it can affect you, the emotional manipulator will do it in every convenient case. So just say, "I'm sorry about your problems," and go ahead. With one mind.
2. The emotional manipulator skillfully gives you a sense of guilt .
The Toolbar / she will make you feel guilty about everything - that talk much or that you are too silent, you are emotional or not show their emotions that are very caring and possessive, or that you are completely indifferent ... Absolutely everything can to be used as a tool for your manipulation. Keep in mind that this type of people rarely show clearly what they want - they are accustomed to achieving it by emotionally manipulating others. And since they know that most of us would do anything to get rid of guilt, they are willing to take it away ... to "free" you from it. And one more thing: Watch out by helping him. While you are complaining about your difficult situation, he / she will never ask for help directly. But if you decide to give him / her assistance, be prepared for comments in style:
3. Emotional manipulator assumes the role of assistant.
If you ask the manipulators for help, they will almost always agree. But then they'll take it through your nose. As they help you, they will groan and wonder how difficult it is, how long it takes them ... To make it clear that they do not like it, and that they make a big sacrifice for you. If you tell them to stop, you'll probably be angry with the whims. Then they will bruise: "NATURALLY that I will do it! Who else will do it!" In the end you will again feel guilty that you have committed them. And you will definitely be their big debtors! So do not pay attention to groans and groans - go out to take a shower or stroll until they're done.
4. The emotional manipulator says something, and then behaves as if he did not say it.
If you are in a relationship where it seems to you that you have to record what the other person has told you to remind him / her, they are manipulating you. The emotional manipulator always manages to turn things around to get rid of his words. He / she will explain, explain to you, take water out of nine wells, just to convince you that you have gone wrong. He is so skillful in his lies that you can stand in front of a white board, be told that it is black, and finally you really start to doubt your judgment. What is the medicine? Really record the words of the other. I'm talking seriously! This will prevent any attempt to reverse the truth at a later stage. Of course, I can not help saying that if you get there, you have to seriously ask yourself what you are actually doing with this guy ...
5. Emotional manipulator fights unfairly.
He / she will not tell you in the right text what he thinks. Most often he will tell you through someone else. Or it will show you through fossils and deliberate (no) action. This type of people are passively aggressive. Ie. they will do so to guess how unhappy they are without telling you directly. Here is the following situation: "Of course I will support you for this course, you know I will." But when it is time to sit in front of the laptop to prepare yourself, and around you is a madhouse - the dog barks, the children scream, the TV rotin, your "supportive" mate is seated indifferently, with a blank look in your eyes. Or else he does some of his own stuff without any interest in what's going on. Exit: Have him / her say how he will help you, what new engagements he will take. If necessary, read section 4 again.
6. An emotional manipulator always needs more sympathy than you.
In other words, if your head is hurt, the emotional manipulator will say there may be a brain tumor. Whatever situation you are, he / she has already experienced it ... only a lot worse. That is why it is difficult for such people to have a normal dialogue. They somehow manage to divert the conversation and direct it to themselves. However, if you have the ill-advised to tell them something about it, they will show you how deeply you've hit them and ... resort to point 2. What do you do? Just stop the conversation. Best contacts with this guy.