How do you explain that you are constantly sinking? Why do you think you are incapable of achieving great things? Do you even happen to think that you do not deserve that things happen to you well?
This sensation is terrible to live. Torn between the desire to live your life fully with serenity, and at the same time you impose this rigors.
This manipulation of the mind forces you to act against yourself. And it is a general evil that is gradually established, and influences many areas of your life.
Yet it is in self-esteem that you recognize your value, and your skills. And it is the self-confidence that allows you to face the difficulties, and to move forward. But everyone can be under the influence of a negative thought. And this evil being is fairly widespread since it affects all social classes and all generations.
This kind of thought will then set before you all kinds of barriers, which will prevent you from acting. And these thoughts will always be devaluing and negative towards yourself!
If you suffer from these disorders and have a real negative impact on your life and well-being, it is imperative that you seek to identify the causes.
You will be able to determine the measures to take, and choose your tools and strategies to set up. There are many solutions, especially in personal development. But the goal you have to aim is first of all to take action to advance, affirm yourself, and gain skills.
Here are some causes that can feed lack of self-confidence, or low self-esteem:
The look of the others,
permanent comparison with other
doubt (his choices, his skills)
the fear of criticism
exclusion, and the anguish of feeling rejected
Self-esteem, your value scale
I like to define self-esteem rather as a kind of value. And this value is the motivation that will influence all your behaviors, and your choices in life. Each has its own personal scale of values. So we all make different choices. And self-esteem necessarily comes into your decision-making when these choices arise. Whether you have a high regard for yourself or the contrary, it will necessarily have consequences.
It is therefore by this value that you will have to pass to reach the let loose and realize yourself. I will definitely go into more detail on the notion of letting go in an upcoming article. But already know this: to let go is to accept its limits. By dint of trying to control everything around you, you waste your energy and end up losing your serenity. Your emotions, your feelings, are inscribed through this thought.
To be comfortable with yourself and to be proud of yourself, your skills, your accomplishments, but also your potential, you will first have to accept your limits. Once this step is reached, you will be able to review your value yourself. You will realize that you absolutely can not control everything in your life. But also that nothing is ever frozen since you have the ability to learn, understand, and improve your skills, and therefore your self-esteem.
Self-confidence to boost your charisma
If you suffer from a lack of self-confidence, you may feel locked into a personality that is not yours. You feel like you are never truly yourself, and you can not develop your potential.
Now imagine two people with the same starting potential. Only, one to the necessary self-confidence that the other does not have. On whom would you put in terms of success? Obviously other parameters will be taken into account, such as good or bad choices of each. But where the difference will be, it is the experience acquired by the person who has developed his self-confidence.
Of course, it will also have failed. But these failures will be a source of learning, and will strengthen his confidence, and his charism. And it is there, the difference of vision of a person trusting in itself. She will never again see obstacles and failures in the same way.
When you lack self-confidence, you live with the feeling that you can not invest in anything. Each risk-taking is a huge source of anxiety that you prefer most of the time avoid.
Self-confidence is the capital you need to progress. It will allow you to dare to bet on yourself and your abilities. Indeed, self-confidence develops through your small and great successes that you win throughout your life. They testify to your ability to succeed in a number of areas. They bring you personal value, and feed your charisma.
But your mistakes and failures are also important to me. Why ? Because they teach you that you can get up. That failures are not an end, but a source of learning to be able to do differently the next time.
How to improve these personal skills?
If we summarize, then we have on one side your potential determined by your self-esteem, and your value (often in comparison to others) that represents your confidence in you. It is therefore these two skills that I advise you to work in order to improve the quality.
And for that, I share the different keys to achieve this:
1) Open up to others
The first solution will be to open yourself up to others, and to your environment. You have to confront new situations in order to acquire new skills.
This is certainly the biggest challenge that a person who suffers from lack of self-esteem can experience. But it is the key that will take you to the other side of the barrier, and will bring you into a positive thought.
2) Learning to manage your stress
If you have chosen to take action, you will encounter THE major obstacle to your progression: stress. It can totally paralyze you in the face of a new situation, or has new people. You will need to get to know him, then manage this stress. Maybe some people will promise you methods to make it totally disappear.
I do not believe that stress can go away. On the contrary, I think that is even useful. But only if it is mastered, and coherent.
3) Dare to assert yourself
Good ! You have chosen to open yourself up to others, while learning to master your stress and anxieties. Now, you will have to show some initiative. And for that, you will have to learn to assert yourself.
Again, not everything will happen overnight. But in order not to shrink from the first obstacle, the affirmation seems to me an essential point. And by showing charisma and asserting yourself in your choices, you will finally reach the goals or goals of your "new life".
4) Choose goals
The logical next step is obviously to choose objectives. It is essential to know in which direction (s) you wish to go. Whether it is professional, personal, in love, you will have to determine a course. I advise you not to set the bar too high at the start. Stay in the realm of reason, so as not to encounter too many failures from the start.
Then there will be absolute determination to achieve your goals!