One thing I most time think about is time, we all say how fast time flies. And recently I was reading a post where someone was talking about what if the hours in a day were to be increased, as it is 24hours now, what if it should become 30 or 30+hours, will it still be enough?
The simple truth is, no. Because each and every day already has its own task. Some are even postponed till the next, while we do away with some. That's why you find out that, even when the day is almost over, you still find yourself trying to catch up or meet up with a thing.
Last week Thursday happened to be one like that, I had to do a lot of things. I had to get something in the market, I was the president of my CDS group and we are having a personal hygiene awareness at a school, while doing and preparing for all of that, my members were calling me to come pick them or help explain to the bike man the location where the school we are using is, and some of my customers who needed clothes for the upcoming Muslim festival were as well bombarding me with calls and Whatsapp messages of the kind of clothes and shoes they want.
And what would you have me do, I was doing all of it at once. My LGI who was our boss was also asking me to make calculations of everything we contributed, what we spent and what we have remaining. After the whole program and all, I began receiving calls from some members who came for the program and had forgotten either their powerbank, charger, cap and such at the school we used. It was a very stressful day for me. At the end of the day, I looked at how my session for the program went, it didn't go the way I wanted, because I was not organized, I was glad I had chosen about three other people to talk as well, if not it would have been somehow.
Around 8 PM that day, I couldn't even do anything again, I had written, typed and all to an extent that my hands were already shaking. Even I know I'm tired, because it was obvious I had ignored my limit. That evening I called my LGI and told him we would need to choose executives amidst us, I can't keep doing it all alone, the weight of those tasks are just too much for me. And even though my body was complaining, I have no one to hand them (the tasks) over too, the few who helped that day didn't do much too.
So, now I'm beginning to see things and allow myself some rest. I drw out my plans, go for the most urgent one's and put the rest on the waiting list, if I later have time for them, fine, and if I don't, it should wait. Also, I'm starting to speak up now and ask for help, because at the end of the day I need to respect my limits in order to be more productive.
Also, this other topic happens to be one I can't over look. Reason being that I've found out that there are some things that I do at times and later find out that I didn't do them because I want to, but it was out of guilt and fear.
About two months ago, two of my junior colleagues in school called me because they needed help with their projects. I was taking a class when they called, it was a WhatsApp call, so I picked it up and agreed to help them on the spot. The truth is, I said yes to them because I didn't want to disappoint them. Throughout that week I had to inconvenience myself and my students for them. Because I'm a school teacher, I need to teach my students and I also need to prepare and do certain things for myself and well.
At the end, I was weak, drained and exhausted, because I didn't act out of choice but our of fear of letting them down, and out of guilt that, what if they didn't meet up with the deadline or what if they go ahead with it and failed.
I can tell you that that decision of mine and the toll it had on me and my health, and I fell sick for over a week. It was after I recovered I sat myself down and had a rethink. Since then, if there's anything that pop's up, I ask myself if it's something I want to do, or it's something I'm doing out of guilt or fear. And that has helped me to turn certain things/task down, while I focus on things that I want to do and are important.
And that's how I realized how powerful choice can be. Because before doing a thing or agreeing to do a thing, it is important that we know the reason behind what are saying yes or no to. And I can tell you in all honesty that it has helped me be in control of the things I do, it has helped me manage my time, it has helped reduce my stress and it has helped me live more for myself.
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Images are mine.
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