Hey? You remember the eighties? That's right, when Iron Maiden were good and ice cream came in such flavours as Mint Choc Chip?
Well, I remember them. Oh yes. So when I had the chance to buy a beer that boasted of tasting like Mint Choc Chip ice cream what could I do except pop a few nostalgia chubbers and grab them bad boys by the tail!
This week I have two wildly contrasting beers. I have a dark stout versus a dark IPA!
I know, crazy, right? I mean you can't compare a stout to an IPA. That's what they say anyway but I always tell them, I do not see what is on the surface. I look deeper than that.
And with that little philosophical nugget out of the way, let's get this battle of Stouts versus IPA's on the go!!
The first beer is the most enigmatic perhaps. It is not the Mint Choc Chip, oh no. It is a Chocolate Brownie Sundae Stout. It is brewed as part of the Dark & Wild City series.
Which is something to do with Satan and the end of everything or something.
Well, who am I to refuse to play my part in the great fall of man?
Let's go!
Northern Monk collaborate with two other breweries for this one, Old Chimneys and Wander Beyond to create a stout with oodles of chocolate and velvet which should remind all of us hungry beer monkeys of the delicious flavours of a Chocolate Brownie Sundae.
I aint ever had a Chocolate Brownie Sundae but it does sound attractive. Hell, if it were wearing a dress I might be tempted to give it one of my special raised eyebrows.
But enough of me and my huge success with the ladies.
Like a black velvet glove filled with soot smeared mice, it slips into the glass. I can almost hear the squeaking. It looks decadent, brooding and ancient. Full of dark and primordial chocolate knowledge like an old dog that is far too fond of the arse sniffing of its brethren.
But the taste?
The taste is astonishing! It's a decadently smooth and chocolate'y, fudge delight!! It's quite literally what sexy panthers must eat for their tea!! Hot damn, call the police, this stuff is amazing!! 10/10 booms!!
What can follow this belter?
Well, now we have Scoop! The IPA that claims to have all of the dark choc chip goodness of a Mint Choc Chip ice. Ooft, I feel exhausted after typing that sentence.
How can it be?
Can it be?
Only one way to see.
Phwooahhr, the sheer caramel black is reminiscent of the wax from a Rhino's ear. I don't believe I have ever seen such an IPA and believe you me, I have seen a few.
I can smell the booze from it. Like an angry woman I can sense it wanting to leap at me and tear at me with it's sexy black teeth.
Come and take me!
Burnt malts, huge chocolate filth coming at me like an enraged and muddy swan. And the mint, oh my golly the mint. This thing is a hot donkey running through the desert sun. And by that I mean it's a fine thing! A deserving 9/10 booms!
A fine week! I can rest happy that the Bear-Man has earned a reprieve!
Cheers everyone! Have a great weekend!