Hey! Are you under lockdown thanks to the pesky Corona virus?
Do you have children who are currently not at school and are eroding your sanity by deciding to communicate solely through the medium of shrieking and fighting?
Perhaps you have an animal as a pet that has decided to start shitting everywhere just to spite you because obviously being locked down in a pressure cooker house with your loving family isn't punishment enough for your past sins?
Are you forced to eat basic food like a peasant and drink black coffee because all the real peasants have cleaned the shops out of fucking everything?
Have you had to wipe your ass with tinfoil because those same peasants above have purchased all of the paper products in the entire world?
Perhaps you are being made to work from home and engage in WebEx sessions in which the video quality is so bad it looks like you are talking to people comprised entirely of Lego?
Well, I can't promise to fix all of the above for you but heck, if I can fix one of them you might get ten minutes peace to at least go to the toilet without your kids following you and remarking on your poo-face.
But how?
This one is simple and it's for the kids.
Did you know that if you Google certain animals, Google offers a chance to View in 3D?
What!? You didn't? Let me show you!
Grab your kids and and your phone. Sit down in an open space and Google Lion.
It offers you the opportunity to View in 3D
Click that button!
Now it shows you this.
See that very special bit underneath the lion, View in your space.
Click it and let the magic begin...
It will engage your camera and ask you to move your phone about here and there.
And then...
Tada!! A fucking mahoosive lion will appear in your room! (Not really in your room.)
Your kids will stop fighting/screaming/shitting themselves and gaze at your phone in awe and wonder.
There are lots of animals that it works with.
In fact the list is literally endless.
Go on. Start filling up your home with sexy animals!!!
You're welcome!