Why being an introvert is much better than being an extrovert. A lot people demand and seek advices for becoming an extrovert these days. The reason why that has happened is, there is a certain popularity factor being an extrovert carries in our minds. Let’s first consider this statement that a lot of people feel: “My shy nature is such a disadvantage !”. Take two of the greatest actors in the world: Robert Deniro and Daniel Day Lewis, both extremely shy and introverted, and they are performance artists. But how can person be shy and perform on stage in front of a crowd ? because acting is a skill, skills are built from practice. Johnny Depp is an introvert, Stephen Colbert is an introvert, a lot of the greatest geniuses were shy and introverted.
The reason we think extroverted personality is an answer is because of two problems: your want to be popular or impressive and your want to be charming and pleasant. One is showing off your personality and the other using your personality to please others. You cannot please everybody and I say this realizing that we all seek acceptance. In order to be impressive, find and build your thing, even a confident speaker requires immense practice.
So let’s examine behaviourally, what is more advantageous: being an introvert or the other ? Take three simple basic observations: (1)being an extrovert has nothing to do with intelligence. (2) humans majorly want acceptance from people. (3) if one tends to express themselves easily, their emotions gets expressed as well. Combine these three and you get a person who is readable. What you are doing is exposing your behavioural patterns for everyone to see, and your weaknesses are exposed. Understand one simple thing: the more you talk and display yourself, the more you tell others about yourself. You make yourself easy to figure out. See, even manipulation is done by planting fear, doubt, desire, by using keywords and tiny sentences. Human tend to get confused by paragraphs, but easily catch on to tiny sentences with compact meanings. That’s why advertising uses catch phrases and clever lines that stick in your head.
Now lets talk about speaking less. One who speaks less gets to observe others more, hear others and possibly read them. He is getting to know who’s faster than those who are busy telling others who they are. Second, your personality is mystery. You are non threatening to them. Nobody knows what your skills are, capabilities are. Everybody assumes based on the silence that you are a nobody. Third, people accept you because, one, they are not challenged by you and ,two, everybody wants to be heard.
Therefore what we learn is, one personality engages in the display of their strengths and weaknesses, the other is a mystery. In any situation , I would consider being a mystery a better option than exposing myself. Because being impressive has nothing to do with personality type. It has everything to do with what skills you have, your product, store of knowledge, basically content. To talk a lot or express yourself is not a skill, it is a behavioural trait. Therefore it isn’t impressive when devoid of impressive content. For example, I am an extrovert and I choose silence over announcing my existence in every room I enter. I look for data, information, anything I can find on anybody. So I remain quiet and observe. If you want to get ahead of people, you’d want to know everything about them, and them to know nothing about you. Be as non-threatening as you can be. Be as nice as you can be, people like quiet people because they think they are either weak or nice. Use that ! It’s such a great common misunderstanding.
So, when do you strike ? At the moment of opportunity. Then you show who you are. Learn from animals as you much as you can. Hunting animals know how to brilliantly camouflage themselves and store their energy, they use it in their attacks. Make a display when there is something at stake. Otherwise, listen and smile. What are the two greatest wants people subconsciously have ? the insatiable want to be heard by others and be accepted. Two simple actions fulfil them both: listening and smiling. But again, you have to build the content that impresses others. And that takes work, practice and dedication. If you have nothing to show for and you are shy, of course it’s going to suck. And the ability to speak confidently wouldn’t change that either. People are impressed by things they can’t do or haven’t done. When you hear a great singer in front of you, you’re not just focussed on the music but are also admiring their ability to sing. You’re impressed by a thing you haven’t done which requires a lot of hard work. It’s that simple. Whether they are introvert or extrovert doesn’t even cross your mind.
So, what do you have to show for ? if you want to be impressive, to be accepted, develop yourself so you become what others aren’t. As long as you are weaker than them, you will go unnoticed. And by weaker again, I mean, in terms of content. So screw the longing for a shift in your personality and start working on your skills that others are going to get impressed by.
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