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"You don't realize how lonely you are until its the end of the day and you have a bunch of things to talk about, but no one to tell them to."
Have you ever been in the deepest part of your life that even hawks in the middle of the night can get lost? Have you ever been in the lowest point of your life that even sun raise above seemed nowhere to be found?
Let me tell you something, I've been there.
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When loneliness inside strikes...
Silence for a while, no talk for a minute or two ...or even an hour.
Imagine a class composed of 50 plus students, and there you are at the corner ...all alone. You are empty as white paper and trying to search a content within your soul. Then your friend went at you and asked what happen, you smiled and said you are okay and just need some fresh air. But in reality, a tremendous nothing superiored again inside.
Nothing more good happened; your teacher came, gave an exam and left assignments. Quite as air, you're still speechless. There's something in your head that keeps on bothering to your perspective in that day. Does loneliness strike again?
Oftentimes, it happened to me. It seems like it became my regular visitor once in a month or two, but I get used to it. We've been in different situations in our lives, situations that made us who we are today and sometimes who will be tomorrow.
Let us define loneliness
You may heard several times the phrase of "I'm lonely" or the word itself "loneliness" but never knew the quite scary definition behind of it. Loneliness is defined as a general feeling of sadness as a result of being alone or feeling disconnected from others. Social Isolation is it's synonym.
What if I tell you that loneliness can lead you to death? Yes, indeed. Loneliness can lead you to your grave. Would you still allow it to swallow you?
At least once, everybody in this world became lonely in their lifetime. Loneliness can be caused either family or personal problems, living all alone, death of loved ones, physical and mental health, for being an introvert, rejection or retirement. Yes, it's okay to be lonely sometimes; but is a threat and alarming for some quite reasons.
Loneliness and health
Loneliness is not just a feeling to never mind, it is indeed a threat and very harmful to everybody.
Loneliness and physical health
- Loneliness increases the likelihood of mortality by 26% (Holt-Lunstad, 2015)
- The effect of loneliness and isolation on mortality is comparable to the impact of well-known risk factors such as obesity, and has a similar influence as cigarette smoking (Holt-Lunstad, 2010)
- Loneliness is associated with an increased risk of developing coronary heart disease and stroke (Valtorta et al, 2016)
- Loneliness increases the risk of high blood pressure (Hawkley et al, 2010)
- Lonely individuals are also at higher risk of the onset of disability (Lund et al, 2010)
Loneliness and mental health
- Loneliness puts individuals at greater risk of cognitive decline (James et al, 2011)
- One study concludes lonely people have a 64% increased chance of developing clinical dementia (Holwerda et al, 2012)
- Lonely individuals are more prone to depression (Cacioppo et al, 2006) (Green et al, 1992)
- Loneliness and low social interaction are predictive of suicide in older age (O’Connell et al, 2004)
- Maintaining independence
Symptoms of Loneliness
Can you tell somebody that he or she is lonely? These symptoms I found from webmd are very useful.
- Trouble concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions
- Fatigue
- Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, and helplessness
- Pessimism and hopelessness
- Insomnia, early-morning wakefulness, or sleeping too much
- Irritability
- Restlessness
- Loss of interest in things once pleasurable, including sex
- Overeating, or appetite loss
- Aches, pains, headaches, or cramps that won't go away
- Digestive problems that don't get better, even with treatment
- Persistent sad, anxious, or "empty" feelings
- Suicidal thoughts or attempts
Fight it
You can never tell when will be loneliness will strike you, it is like an earthquake. You know it will happen now, later or sooner; but you'll never know exactly when. I became lonely when I become stress, see things that can lead me back to my past and or something happens unexpectedly out as planned.
Keep distance for a while.
I'm telling you, I distant myself for a while. I'll go to the nearby windows, see some good landscapes and breath fresh air. It really help me escape what I felt. Because sometimes, you really need some space.
Open yourself
I mean, you are not alone in this world. In your circle of friends, there are at least one or two of them ready to hear you out. Go tell them everything you wanted to tell, because they will listen and that's for sure.
Find others like you
If you can't open yourself up to your friends, or even to your best friend or family, go and find others like you. Talk with them about the loneliness they felts, and eventually, both of you will have a good benefit. In this way, both of your negativities will turn into positivity.
Be lonely sometimes, and not in almost every second
The negative feeling may seem to grow more in every single day that passes, but you have to remind and limit yourself for too much. I know how much difficult it is to fight loneliness, but you'll have to.
Get an enough sleep
Sleep is better than taking drugs, of course. Trust me, it will lessen when you wake up in the morning.
Eat as much as you can
I mean, food is also a great reliever. No I am not that kind of person whenever I became lonely I eat. The bitterness you felt will surely be replaced with the sweetness of chocolate you tasted.
Walk and run
Go and sweat out your loneliness. It may sound funny, but I'll run or jug kilometers when I'm upset and lonely.
Deal it with passion
I have read before that artists are one of the loneliest people of the world, and yet they manage to do an amazing piece. When loneliness strikes you, get a pen and write; get your brush and paint; get a microphone and sing; insert the cd and dance; and or get the frying pan and cook.
Value your life
It's always a choice to be drowned by your own negative feeling. Life is beautiful, loneliness is just a garnish to make this bittersweet. Life can never always be in positive side, it also needs a negative to make this life balance.
Make it a lesson
Consider it as a worthy experience. Whatever makes you sad, put this in mind that everything happens for a reason. You might wonder why it happened today, but I swear to you it has a worthy and valuable reason; so continue your life.
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I hope I have motivated you. Love your life. Always.
Mike
