From his infancy, as he told me, he suffered a lot of abuse due to many physical hatred by his close relatives because he was the first male child from his mother's side. He gave me an insight on how mother was brutally matcheted when he was a few months old. This made him to be taken away to his maternal home where they brought him up. The hatred was so intense that these relatives of his never wanted him alive. They practically wanted to stop another generation from coming from him. What a life?
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As the first male child, he had to struggle to make a living for himself and his other siblings. This move he took without looking back. He did all manner of jobs to see that his aged illiterate parents were comfortable. The story of what becomes of his siblings is a story for another day.
Beyond the above, what remains evergreen from my late father are numerous from which I will share a quantum.
Brotherly
He ensured to the best of his ability to care for the academic, social and marital well-being of his siblings. My father relocated to Lagos after the Nigerian Civil War in the 1970s to begin a job in housekeeping then to steward and later to a chef. Proceeds from the venture were sent home for school fees of his wards and the upkeep of the entire family. My dad was selfless. He wanted to build an empire from his five-member family. He wished at a very young age that this vision became a reality. Till date, people from.outside our immediate family still mention to the hearing of my siblings and I how my father had one way or the other supported their lives or visions. For this, I am grateful to be born by such a man whom history will never forget in a jiffy.
Patience
It is difficult to find a patient man. It is not like men are not patient but among every ten men, you may hardly find three patient men. On the path of my father, he was so patient that he took up some very little kind of paying job. He wasn't in a rush to gather wealth. He grew from the ranks and files to become relevant everywhere he went. At times, I overhear some of his friends asking to move swiftly but he would rather slow it down and still arrive at the same expectation.
Benevolent
One thing I have learned from my late father before he passed on was his attitude of being a helping hand to people. My father could go all out to render financial assistance to folks even if it was the last money he had on him, sometimes to the detriment of his family. I bet you, such kind men are scarce in our time.
My father loved us so much. He was jovial and caring. We got close to him because his arms are always open to receive us. Each time I remember some of the moves he made on my behalf and the place he went to help me sort out some things, I appreciate the almighty for giving me a father like him.
Ba'aba as we fondly called was a father among fathers. I missed a lot of things now because he has gone to the great beyond.
As my mentor, he told me never to outshine my boss. Even if I knew something, I should never be forward to exhibit my knowledge to avoid being tagged. I later found this rule in Robert Greene's book, Laws of Power.
Ba'aba died in his prime a few years after he retired from active service with the Lagos State Civil Service. However, his legacies are alive in his children. I am glad that the teachings, discipline and morals my father instilled in my siblings and I are now worth more than any wealth that could be handed to a generation.