Just Can’t Understand Money

I have tried it for a long time now, and it just doesn’t work. I can’t visualize money. It is impossible. I have tried and tried, and it just seems like there is some veil in front of my eyes. I went to the extent of even reading books on money and tried different ways of visualizing money. So, tricks like 'think of what you can buy with money', 'how it makes you feel', and other introspective questions were done. But all these don’t make me feel wealthy. I am using money and wealth interchangeably here – the idea being, how do I feel wealthy without money?

I even tried the circumventing style – that is, look at any other areas of my life where I feel rich and then express the same feeling on the wealth front. A few years back, I realized that I don't feel rich in any area of my life (Sad life). Eventually, I did find some areas of my life. Yet all those realizations and feelings couldn't undo my inability to visualize money. Just to clarify – I can visualize my health or physical body very well. I can see my biceps, abs, and other parts of my body as I want, and I can work towards a better me. The same is true about other areas of my life, but just NOT MONEY. It is outstandingly difficult.

I was an engineering student, and visualization was one of the requirements of engineering drawing in the early days of my studies. Isometric, Orthographic, and other styles of drawing need a healthy dose of visualization, and I was extremely good at it. Not only that, but I was also good at earning money, but this arms-length distance or step-brotherly treatment was almost subconscious. Everytime. I felt anxious when I had money and was relaxed when it got spent. And then started the wait for the next month’s salary. I will not get into explaining much of this right now, but it was the way it was.

And it was one of the reasons I kept falling off the grid in terms of earning money. I would get to a level of earning good money, then grow anxious, and then lose it all. The cycle was non-stop.

Time to Look Inwards | And I Assure You I Have Been Doing That for Ten Years Now | Not Much

The first time I learned about energy exercise was in my first job, and I thank God for that CEO of mine. This was more than twenty years back, and I can still feel the relief I felt in some areas of my life, and I thought I could use this to clear all the muck in my head. I learned Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) as a form of energy exercise back then and have been using it since then. I have cleared a lot of things, and I am quite different from how I was back then, but one thing that hasn’t changed much is my situation with money.

To be fair, I didn’t broach the topic of money in my early days, and I think it could be one of the two reasons – I didn’t think it was a problem, or I kept an arms-length distance with money even back then. Frankly, I don’t remember. The very fact that I don’t remember should tell you how much I avoided the idea of money.

But then, ten years back (or that’s how far back I remember) is where I learned that there was something wrong between me and money. I have been on with the energy exercise ever since, but couldn’t crack much. Also, the energy exercises weren’t limited to just EFT. I even tried NLP and other energy exercises, and Ho’oponopono is the most recent one. Nothing worked. That is, until as recently as yesterday.

It wasn’t a breakthrough, but I saw something. Even now, the idea of money is just a haze. I am not sure what or why, but I think I will put it out for you all to witness my experience. And if it helps you, then nothing better than that.

Ho’oponopono To Crack the Idea of Money | Some Progress | A Start

I am not getting into explaining Ho’oponopono much, but I am sure you will get enough and more information on this energy technique from the net. It is while using this technique that I got to visualize the aspect of money in my life. I have tailored my Ho’oponopono technique to align with God, and so, here is how I do it.

I am sorry, Lord God Almighty, that I am unable to visualize your blessings of money.
I am sorry, Lord Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, that I am unable to see your blessings of money.

Forgive me, Lord God Almighty, that I am unable to see your blessings of money.
Forgive me, Lord Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit, that I am unable to see your blessings of money.

Thank You, Lord God Almighty, for Your blessings of money.
Thank You, Lord Jesus Christ, Thank You, Oh Holy Spirit, for your blessings of money.

I love You, Lord God Almighty, for your blessings of money.
I love You, Lord Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit, for your blessings of money.

This is how I normally use (and, in this case, specifically to money) Ho’oponopono, and it has worked wonderfully for me as I unite it with my prayer to God. In this particular case, I could visualize my financial situation. I am just going to describe it as I could see it:

“It was almost like me buried under tiles and concrete, hardened so much that I couldn’t even see myself. And it was like a structure built to encase me in a corner. Forget me seeing the money (or visualizing), I couldn’t even see myself in that situation."

I use prayer in between Ho’oponopono, and I prayed to God to discard this concrete infrastructure in the fires of hell and release me from it. Then I opened myself to God to make me whole again and give me the ability to see money and/or knowledge to deal with money.

It still was baffling to know that the entire idea of money was encased in concrete in my mind. What did that even mean? Anyway, now that it is discarded, I am looking forward to seeing how things pan out.

So, Here Is Where I Am | Let’s See What Difference It Makes

This is not the first time I have been dealing with the idea of money, and it took me so long to reach here. I hope I am at the end of it. Now I leave it to God to bring home the point. With God, anything is possible.

I will keep updating on how things are for me. But I am happy to have made some progress.

Image Courtesy: Peggy_Marco on Pixabay(dot)com | Mohamed_Hassan at Pixabay(dot)com