As a challenge, I decided a couple of weeks ago and write an post every Friday
its gone well a think. but to day a dont feeling it at all, in a long time my power is over 90%
am always starting my day going true my feed up voting and commitment but to day and yesterday a did not do it.
a just up vote a few user not ever reading there posts. feels bad man.
so insert random..lol a had a nice psychologist hour yesterday, we talk me getting a job and me do not believe in
the big plan this is something ho is creeping on to me.
the big plan is to find a place a can call home and be happy there.
but a dont now what makes me happy a now am happy when am on my bike. but am not sure on the rest of the time am here. a was sure burning man made me happy but not sure anymore a was not happy there a feel alone there to even if a was living in a super nice camp whit my best friends a have this sorrow inside me
when am whit people a almost always getting the best of me. a getting sad over all the time a lost so then a shoot me in the food by not being in the moment.
a play a lot of games on my PC but it has always been a way to escape my real life, a like it but am not happy when a do it. its not like playing a game should. more like a work to not be sad.
a fund one place a want to work have not got a answer yeat, am hoping. a was thinking to get work in IKEA or some big store just a job but here is the deal am not desperate for money, but am desperate to find my propose, a Ned to find something ho do make sens to me. so under my last psychologist hour.
if a get the job at the bike shop this is going to be may way there.
she ask me what makes me happy. and where are it?
me: a want to move to the forest get a dog and a bike or 2
she remembered a farm outside of Vancouver. u can go there and work the land and u getting pay by giving u a bed and food. its a organic farm super old school. so am going to send them a application
if not these year maybe a can do next year.
but all and all a bit shit day but its ok. and a did my random so this is good.