Chapter 21 WARNING EXPLICIT ADULT MATERIAL-continuing saga of an abused woman
Little one stayed away from mommy and grandma. She missed taking care of the baby but the two women were always fighting over the brat. Hiding in the attic was fun. She watched the road from the attic window and even though it was always cold in the room, she was finally able to sleep.
There was a backyard with trees and bushes where Little one could hide when she could get out. She played in the sun beyond the briers. The trees were starting to change color, and the squirrels ran up and down gathering seeds and pine cones for winter.
Since she was out of sight and out of mind her life became calmer. The horrors of the past years was starting to disappear into her dreams and sometimes there were nightmares but they were coming fewer and farther between.
Sometimes there was food on the stairway, sometimes not. When the food was there she would quietly sneak down and eat whatever was left. She would wash her clothes in the bathroom sink and hang them in the attic to dry. One morning Grandma came to the stairs and called for Little one to come down. She came slowly down the stairs watching for Mommy. Grandma grabbed her skinny arms and cackled with glee. “ You are going to go to school. Here is a dress that your mother wore when she was little. Go up and wash and put the dress on. Hurray up we have to leave in a few minutes”.
Little one grabbed the dress. It was blue with ruffles and a lace collar. The lace was torn and the sleeves were worn out at the elbows. It fit like a sack on Little one's tiny body but it was something different. Little one pulled the dress over her head and the sleeve ripped. She was scared that she would get into trouble but was more frightened leaving the safety of the attic.
Grandma called to her- “come down you little brat- we're leaving”. Grandma pulled her arm and the other sleeve ripped. She dragged Little one down the stairs and shoved her toward the door. Little one fell and Grandma realized she had no shoes on. With a humpf and a guttural disgust Grandma swung Little one up against her hip and trudged out the door. She walked down the road toward the school and all the parents and kids watched as she marched into the school and up to the principal's office.
Grandma forced Little one to sit on the bench while she went into the office. Kneeling, Little one looked out into the hall. All the children had on their new clothes for school. They pointed to her and laughed. No shoes, dirty uncombed hair, ripped dress and tiny frame made her feel like the ugly squirt that her father had always called her.
The principal came out and Grandma left. Little one tried to make herself tiny and scrunched into a ball on the bench. With her head tucked into her neck, her dirty hair covered her shoulders and face. Another lady came into the room and took Little one into a large white room. She took Little one to the sink and started to wash her. She made Little one take off her clothes and clean herself with paper towels and water. Little one was afraid as the lady came towards her. She wanted to cry but held her head up and her chin out. Nobody was going to make her cry. No, she had all the tears beaten out of her during “Daddy” days.
The lady came back with pants and a shirt. They were bigger than Little one but smaller than the ripped dress. The lady was kinder now and tried to comb the knots out of Little one's hair. Each tug and pull hurt but never as much as when Daddy would pull her up by her hair. Finally the lady gave up and just gathered the hair up with a rubber band. Next came the shoes. There were three pairs and one actually fit her tiny feet.
The principal came into the room and after some hasty words between the ladies, she came toward Little one. She bent down and smiled but didn't want to get close. She took Little one by the hand and walked her down the hallway. All the children were in classrooms and the school was bright and clean. Principal stopped in front of the door to room 102. She looked into the window of the door and signaled the teacher.
A tall pretty lady looked out and smiled. She opened the door and looked at Little one. She said she was Mrs. Berly and asked Little one's name. The principal said it was Patty. So that was her name. No one had ever called her by that name before. So she had a name. What a surprise! Mrs. Berly ushered Patty into the classroom and introduced her to the other children.
Patty wanted to crawl under the desks and hide in the corner. Everyone was so neat and clean. They were happy and smiling and the classroom was pretty.Patty definitely did not fit into the picture. She fit better outside in the woods than here. What should she do? How was she going to manage to fit in to this place? Would her Grandma come and get her and take her home?
Mrs. Berly told Patty to take a seat and she continued to read to the class. The story was about a frog and a toad. The story told about being friends and helping each other. Soon the story was finished and Mrs. Berly told the class to go to the play area. There were dolls that were like her brother. There was a kitchen with small cabinets and food that looked really good. Patty went to the food and smelled it. There was no smell. All the pieces were hard. The kids that were in the kitchen started to laugh as Patty tried to eat a banana. Mrs. Berly came over and put her arm round Patty's shoulders. Tears welled up in her eyes because nobody had ever been so gentle with her. Mrs. Berly whispered that tomorrow would be better and that her grandma was here to pick her up.