While chatting with @surpassingggoogle this morning, we were talking about #teardrops and how it brings the #human out. I was telling him about my tears and how I feel as a mother far away from her child. He could relate being far from his mom before too, I guess.
Talking about how so many testimonies coming out showing the human side of #steemians. How Facebook is becoming obsolete. I just check there for updates on my daughter and family who far from me. I don't spend much time there anymore. How to understand life and that the world is just painted with so many plastic and unreal things going around. He is hoping that by #teardrops it will help bring out the human in people, and I think it is beginning too.
So I told him my worries as a mother far from her only child. He said to pour it out on teardrops and I will. He said "So sorry yes, so painful, You will cry and pray with the tears. Jehovah answers those specially." And when I said I hope #Steemit will help me renew my passport so I can go to her someday he also answered "Yes you can" How nice to get words of encouragement and words of comfort form someone you look up to for guidance. Just shows he is HUMAN
I am a single mom. Had my lovely daughter when I was 26. I was not able to have a normal delivery even if I was capable. I had an emergency cesarean section because her head turned. If I pushed I would have v broken her head and my heart. I am thankful and grateful for doctors who are calm and knows what they are doing. Unfortunately I had CA of the endometrium a few years later so no ore chance of having another child. So she is my one and only love of my heart.
She was a beautiful baby. I was not the perfect mother. I had my ups and downs. I had to raise her without a father but she had more than enough father figures with my 3 brothers and my male cousins.
Another person who helped me raise her and help wipe away my tears when they flowed and when I get frustrated and angry is my mother. Now my tears are for her because she has Alzheimer and I miss my old mom.
The first tears I shed for my daughter besides the ordinary childhood diseases, scraps and failures was when she had to go to the US to live her life in 2015. She had to learn how to stand on her own. It was hard for me because I had her for 28 years. But I hope I have taught her well to stand on her own. But she came home in Dec. 2015 to get married and I was happy to see her again and know that know there will be someone to love and care for her if I can't. Tears of joy flowed out. She also came home because she wanted to be part of her grandmaother's (lola) milestone reaching the age of 90.
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I was the happiest when I received these pictures from her. Imagine the happiness a mother feels knowing she will be a mother soon too. But what more for her mother, the grandmother to be. Again the teardrops fell, this time of happiness, joy and escitement.
What saddens me is that I won't be there for her like my mom was here for me. But I am happy her husband is there and her 3 uncles. I know she won't be alone.
Knowing I will have a grandson I was able to buy a few clothes from here and lucky my brother and sister in law came home so I was able to send it to her.
Being able to send these simple things and a few more later makes me feel like I am helping her. Even in my own way I can send something for my grandson to be.
It is a different kind of joy you feel when you are buying for a grandchild than your child. You get excited and you want to get everything. Haha but you know you can't.
Again today I got some bad news. My daughter is in the hospital for the 2nd time. She has PCOS an abnormality that makes it difficult to get pregnant but in one year she was able to. But she also has pre-eclampsia when she got admitted the first time. Dangerous for her and her baby. She got high blood pressure and low sodium count. So she has to take medication fro her BP and also for her potassium. But after 2 months it still seems the same. So again she has to have an IV for potassium. She was advised on her next check up after the first time she was diagnosed to take an emergency leave so I also told her to follow her doctor's orders. So she is resting but today when she had her regular check-up and blood laboratory still low potassium level. I just hope none of these meds will harm the baby. The doctor won't prescribe if it is dangerous.
So here I am pouring out my teardrops, asking for prayers for my daughter in her pregnancy. She is due to give birth next month and I do so wish to be there but I know it is not possible because it is a short time. I also ask for help and prayers that I maybe able to renew my passport because after that I can make it another goal to earn and save even for a one way ticket to California USA during the not peak season so it will be cheaper.
Thank you for the words of comfort and the encouragement. I know I can make it and the prayers from fellow #steemians will make it easier for me knowing other people are caring, bringing out their human side.
A few Quotes from Terry Boy aka " Sharing because they have touched me and I want the others to feel it too.
and the real world don't know they are the real world and imitate the painted
that is exactly what is happening
teardrops is created for balance
tell the unpainted that they have the real world
and tell the painted to come back to the real world
so what i am doing is just compliment to steemit
steemit minds the minds
everything created involves humans
if you understand life and human then that's all truly needed
cos after all, it is humans involved
there will be testimonies
teardrops will record it
all will be recorded on steem
cos all these interfaces is also on steem
so everything will still appear on steemit
This is my testimony. Thank you for reading and understanding. Let the teardrops fall, let the "human" in you out.
PICTURES ARE MINE UNLESS STATED
has been a wonderful person and supportive of our group #SteemitDiversify. Please support him as a witness by voting him at https://steemit.com/~witnesses and type in "steemgigs" at the first search box.
If you want to give him witness voting decisions on your behalf, visit https://steemit.com/~witnesses again and type in "surpassinggoogle" in the second box as a proxy.
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and many others who have visited my posts. Thank you.
I am grateful for that and for everyone who has helped me and my friends.