Hey there steemians! I'm baaaack🎉 This time, I want to share my very own literary piece about my mom and myself. I made this with all my heart and through here, I want to express my deepest and hidden feelings to my mom. I hope that you'd take time to read and reflect on this😊
I AM ME BECAUSE OF HER
I am a girl who was known to be friendly, who takes problems so easily, who always smiles at people even if it's a friend or a stranger and I was believed to have a life filled with love, joy and positivity but life can be deceiving sometimes. The truth is, I am a girl who cries at night, feeling down of all the high expections, all the disappointments and all the problems that came into my life. I even came to the point where I doubted my capabilities and my very own existence and I have to hide the loneliness that I was feeling behind the sweetest smile.
My life revolved around my mother and her high expectations from me. Ever since I was young, my mother wanted me to become the best. She wanted me to become the lady she imagined me to be and there I was, quietly standing infront giving her all the authority to control my life. I lived according to what my mom tells me to do. I'm striving to do well at school to cope to her expectations and I joined every beauty pageant because wanted me to be exposed, to be confident and to look smart in front of everyone. Maybe she wanted to tell the world that she had the best daughter but I wasn't perfect, my life was a mess and it wasn't the life that she always wanted me to have.
My flaws were scars that were visible to others. Everytime I look into her eyes and see the disappointment, it makes me feel that I am useless. I have always wanted to ask my mom if why is she doing this to me? Do I deserve this? Do I need to be perfect to please everyone? Because for me, it's a big no! I really don't care about what others would think about me. What my mom thinks about me, matters the most.
Every single night, I've been dreaming the same dream and in that dream, I had the courage to tell my mom that I have my own perception of my own life, that I want to do the things that I really wanted to do for so long and that I want to prove myself to her that I can be successful if she would just trust and support me just for once. Honestly, I've had enough. I've had enough of all the things that were happening to me. If I am alone, I would usually scream at the top of my lungs but no one seemed to hear and I would cry but no one seemed to notice. That is because they thought that I was strong, that I was always happy but it's true that the happiest person hides the saddest feelings to him/herself and that is what I want my mom to understand. I want her to understand that I am just me and not the Lyka the she always wanted.
But then I realized, I shouldn't do these things because my mom is always right. She just wanted what was best for me. I wasn't expecting that all she did to me, resulted to who I am right now and I am really thankful to her. She just wanted me to continue her dreams because she wasn't capable of doing it anymore. She just wanted me to grow up with no worries nor struggles in life. If it weren't for my mom, I wouldn't be here in this wonderful world and I am not who I am. She may not be the best but her lessons are treasures that will forever be kept in my heart and indeed, "Mother knows best."
I just want to share a piece of advice to those people who somehow felt the way I did, always listen to your mom no matter how unfair nor awful it is to your part because our moms are willing to give up everything for us and we should open our eyes to see and appreciate that. Even though we're growing up, learn to look back from the days when you were still in your mama's arms. Go out there and do the things that makes your mama be proud of you. Never hesistate nor be shy to tell your mom how much you love and appreciate them for they will not be with us forever so while they're still there, learn to respect, love and honor them.
To my mom, THANK YOU and I LOVE YOU SO MUCH 😍💖
