Yesterday was our 20th wedding anniversary. That feels huge to us. It's just bonkers to look back and think - here's the relationship where we said 'I love you' after one night, decided to get married after a week, and then meant I had to move to the other side of the world a few months later to get married within the year. And here we are, still in love.
It also proves you don't need a fortune to get married. My dress cost me 70 pounds on sale and my shoes were from a charity shop (I kicked them off after the church, out on docs and never wore them again). Jamie got his tails from a second hand shop. A friend made us banoffee pie for a cake.
Thirty odd people attended, including my parents, sister and best mate who flew over from Australia. We had a folk band we found at the nettle eating contest in Dorset. My Mum made snacks and we had a fire in the garden. I don't think we spent more than 600 quid and we had the best time, and so did everyone else.
The secret to a happy marriage? I have no idea. All I know is our marriage has been a great one. Maybe you just have to choose the right one in the first place. We have had a few hard times but never doubted our love for each other and always knew that the hard times would pass and we would come back to each other. I have never ever once thought we were done. Everything passes.
I do think listening helps, without trying to change them or give them advice if that's not what they are asking for. You aren't there to fix them, just to support them if they want to fix themselves.
You can get annoyed they've left the towel on the floor again or you can realize that's your thing and hang up the towel without saying anything. Yes, the towel is a symbol for a lot of things. Don't sweat the small stuff if the good stuff outweighs the petty annoyances. At the same time, let them know the towel thing upsets you. They might love you enough to change it. Or not, and you have to decide if that's worth leaving them for. Dont forget you can be annoying too.
A good sense of humour helps. This man makes me laugh nearly every day.
He's taught me the meaning of loyalty, and of never going to bed on an argument. He loves me so hard I can't help but adore him back. There's nothing we won't do for each other.
He loves me more than anything and I love him almost as much as I love surfing, so that's a whole lot.
Honestly, don't listen to me. Trust your heart. I did.
With Love,
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