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There is a growing dilemma of when you will get married, especially when you begin to close in on your twenties. Let's say 25, 26, or 28. It becomes more serious by the time you are in your 30s. Well, that is what Lizzie Damilola Blackburn talks about in her novel, using the character Yinka. Right from the title of the novel, you get to see that this is a novel that has to do with marriage. I have no idea if it is the Nigerian in me or if I'm getting close to the marriage age because of how fast I was able to grab the context of the title.
I know the issue of marriage can be seen from the question being asked to Yinka, Where is your husband? Or still in Yoruba since Yinka, the lead character in the novel, is from that tribe, nibo ni ọkọ rẹ wa?
I did not have to go in deep on this novel before I got to know that it has to be her mother who is probably the one asking the question. Oh, Nigerian parents, you can just know them right from the questions they ask and how they ask them. For a better context, I have to say there is just a resounding voice that keeps going on in my head anytime I hear the statement Yinka, where is your husband? It is more like I can envision Yinka's mother with slippers or a strong koko shoe while asking Yinka the question. I know my imagination is getting the best of me, but Yinka's Mother had to be asking this question with a high-pitched voice combined with a thick Yoruba accent to go with the flow. Give the title another try in reading it out loud, but this time read it from the perspective of a Nigerian mother worrying when her first daughter will settle down and give her grandchildren.
Well, that is the fate of Yinka, the lead character in this interesting novel from a UK-based Nigerian author, Damilola Lizzie Blackburn. Now, here is the twist that comes with the interesting spice of the novel: Yinka is an educated Oxford graduate with a good job, in a working environment, and blessed with a surrounding of supportive friends. But Yinka's only flaw in her mother's eye is that she is not married yet, and now she is in her thirties, 31 to be precise.
Her mother is not settled with the fact that her daughter is not married, and it looks like she is not going to be anytime soon. Yinka's younger sister and cousin have gone down the family path, which looks like Yinka is the only one left out, once again in her mother's eyes. Yinka's marital status is a growing concern for her mother, as she even goes ahead to raise her concern to her daughter and other family members. In return, it causes Yinka to become insecure about her accomplishments in the person she has become since marriage has not been included.
I admire how the author uses good storytelling to craft the pressure of what it feels like to be governed by the notion that marriage is a form of accomplishment rather than a symbol of love. Although the book is set in the UK since Yinka happens to be an Oxford graduate, its story and lesson still resonate with readers far and beyond, as readers understand the concept that you should not let your marital status decide who you are, but rather be confident in the person you have become. To me, I see marriage as a symbol of love and something I would love to do out of my love for the other person and not because I was pressured into it. Pressure leads to cracks in what you are building and, later, to disruption.
Are you looking for something witty and poignant like how Taraji Henson described the novel, then Yinka, where is your Husband?
is your go-to.
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Thanks For Reading!