My calendar is my life partner. You know, after my life partner. But wild horses haven't been able to get me to fully commit to those tidy boxes in which my schedule is (often inaccurately) recorded. I need a new system. I need to commit to a Google calendar. I need a change because my life is busy and not in a way that is likely to slow down. Three kids, partner, dog. Life is ticking along.
I need to figure out some space in the scheduling. That's the problem. Between the in-home services for my eldest child and, you know, the other two children, the best I've done is hit the gym four times a week. Wild horses stand no chance at stopping me from going to the gym. That aspect of my schedule, even though I consistently mis-record the time on my calendar (see above), is non-negotiable.
Other things wild horse can't do include:
-stopping me from writing. Nope. Not happening.
-preventing me from using my wood-burning fireplace despite my allergies. I will suffer in cozy joy, dammit.
-getting me to control my hair. It has a life of it's own.
I like to think of myself as flexible and amenable. I'm afraid I'm actually rigid and particular. Take our family cleanup yesterday; clean only happens when I say it happens. Kids were decluttering, sorting, dusting, and running their belongings to the appropriate rooms for nearly an hour. Meanwhile I washed the kitchen and all tables, and our Roomba gathered detritus from the walkways. It was very Jetsons meets Cinderella with a little bit of Justin Bieber thrown in.
For the record, I played the role of the much abused Cinderella. How is there always a full bag of garbage sitting around my downstairs along with a full load of very dirty laundry? And what's with leaving books in piles on floors when we have wall-to-wall bookshelves? No. Wild horses can't change that I need it to be clean. I crave clean like other people crave peanut butter cups. 
We are up to seven, so let me give you a quick list of what else wild horses can't prevent:
-me reading
-me writing
-me struggling to trust. I've been burned.
Finally, I will never stop dreaming. And by dreaming, I mean reframing with positivity and believing. Even on the worst days. Because no matter how I get stuck, reframing allows me to find the good. Dreaming reminds me of hope.
What's on your "never say die" list?
images from pixabay.com