How to be confident - And defeat your fears!
What is confidence?
In the purest essence, confidence is knowing your skills and where you´re good at mixed with some arrogance which involves believing you perform better in a particular skill than you think. The closer your self-assessment is to the reality, the closer you are to reach a healthy amount of confidence... Knowing what you like is an important issue. It is helpful to know what you are aiming for. I know that there are thousands, no millions of people in the world, who have never experienced confidence in their lives…
It is time to change that!
Confidence does not grow over night, but the more energy you put in letting it grow, the faster you´ll see some changes. Confidence isn´t like a set of rules which you can learn. Positive thinking, training, knowledge and talking to strangers will help you to boost your confidence levels. Feeling good about yourself and your body, accepting yourself as you are and believing in your own ability and skills are the fundamentals of confidence.
Fear.
Does not everyone have fears in different ways? Anyway, we need to illuminate our fears and be confident in the same way…. The problem with fear is that it affects our behavior. So if we want to fight our fears, we should focus on acting as normal and relaxed as possible when we’re in a situation that scares us. Do not fear failure. Rather, fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today!
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In order to change the circumstances we are in, we need to be willing to go to the places inside of us we´ve never been!
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STEP 1 -
CONTROL YOUR BODY
You need to understand your body´s reaction in order to defeat fears in a long run. I read about some good techniques but a simple one is breathing. When you start to feel anxious or scared, try to slow down your breathing a little bit with 2-3 deep breaths.
STEP 2 -
UNDERSTAND AND FOCUS YOUR FEARS
Once the fear hit you hard enough and you feel a lot of pain, you will never feel as much fear again. It will never turn out as bad as before which makes it a lot easier to work with and defeat what scares you! Realize that it is all in your mind! Everything that´s going on happens just in your brain!
STEP 3 -
RANK THE SEVERITY OF YOUR FEAR
On a scale from your worst experience to your best, how would you rank your feelings right now? For example you have to do a presentation in front of 20 people and you would rank it to a 4… Then you realize it is not the scariest thing you experienced before, so it is a lot easier to deal with it! It is not one of your major fears in life and you are maybe just overthinking!
STEP 4 -
DIFFERENT PATHS
You are in a scary situation. Like - You go on a boat trip but are scared as hell because of the big wide ocean. Think about different ways how this could turn out.
- A huge storm crosses the sea and the vessel isn't strong enough and breaks into pieces.
- You could fall down into the ocean and be consumed by a shark
- Some pirates will kidnap you and your loved one´s
- Everything will be okay and you would arrive safely
So, you got all paths which are possible and NOW you can think about doing it or not. If you are scared before anything would happen, list all possible paths and decide after thinking about them, if you should or shouldn't do it!
STEP 5 -
CELEBRATE EVERY SUCCESS
Celebrate every step you completed in the process of defeating your fears!! Even if its a small one. Use this feeling of success and victory to propel yourself forward and take the next step!
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Life is a journey to be experienced, not a problem to be solved!
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It is difficult to have confidence without letting your ego become too dominant.. Confidence is so awesome and you are going to feel very well but too much isn't good either! you need to balance it out ...
Here are my 5 steps for confidence….
STEP 1 -
LOOKS REFLECT MENTALLY
Your look isn´t everything ! Keep that in mind , BUT: The way you look, the way you feel! So this is a major key to reach confidence! You should dress up how YOU like it and if you feel amazing, you´re very close to self-esteem too!
STEP 2 -
DON´T DOUBT YOURSELF
Being a 100% convinced about your ability to achieve the goal makes things far better then they seem to be when you´re not believing in yourself. To be successful in this method, you have to show that you´re fully in the moment and fully part of what´s going on, and that you want nothing less than the best!
STEP 3 -
UNDERSTAND YOUR STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES
An important issue to understand is that no one is perfect! Everyone has got strengths and weaknesses ! We all make mistakes and have weak spots in our lives. But the trick is to deal with it it, know your strengths and make use of them! If you know them, it is a lot easier to get confidence!
STEP 4 -
PHOTOSHOP YOUR SELF-IMAGE
Our self-image means a lot to us, more than we often realize. We have a mental picture of our selves which reflects our confidence. If it´s not a very good one, change it! Use your mental photoshopping skills to fix it and shape it into the way you want it to be!
STEP 5 -
EMBRACE THE UNKNOWN
You really have to fall in love with not knowing! This is probably the hardest part in being confident. Most people are scared of not knowing what will happen next but you truly need to embrace the unknown!
I heard a great example - It´s like reading a book. Not knowing what’s going to happen on the next page, and being excited about it , because it has the potential to be the best page you ever read.
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TIP by SOLDIER - Being confident doesn't mean to be how the society wants you to be! If you feel amazing inside and out, then you don't need to change a thing!
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In order to be successful in any area of your life that you want it to be ( in your job , love etc. ) you need confidence. Focus on things in life that you already achieved ! Stay away from negativity and surround yourself with positive people… Sometimes it is great to just sit down, in my way, listen to some classical music and organize your mind. Make your goals your focus and plan the next steps you are going to take, but leave some space for the unknown… I know you have big dreams for yourself but don't forget to appreciate how far you´ve come already. Remember the days you prayed for the things you have now!
Stay focused
Love,soldier