Why am I doing this?

Let me get straight to the point. Several years ago (about 10) my life was in an extremely dark place, for reasons many can relate to, I'm sure. I won't get into that here on this post though.

 But I'll say this - Somebody I truly loved and respected had told me in no uncertain terms that they didn't want to be around me anymore because my negativity was driving them mad, and bringing them down. They used the analogy that I was like a black hole of negativity, sucking everything in and that not even light could escape! Ouch!

The thing is, it was true. I'd become a constant complainer and my default setting was doom and gloom. I'd nitpick, whinge, moan and bitch about even the slightest things. Nothing was exempt from my dark focus, and being told these things straight up only served to fuel my negativity and strengthen my self-righteous attitude.

At some point, and I'm not sure when, I got honest with myself and realised I needed to change, not the people, places, and things around me. That's when I embarked on a mission to change my outlook, and my efforts paid off big time. The mission continues to this day, and I'll chart some if it over the next few days. There's no said and done here, just like 6 months in the gym won't keep me fit forever either.

I need to do this again

I wish I could say that my story is one where I've sailed off into the sunset, a joyous and free being immune from negativity and self-doubt. But I can't. Things have been tough this year no doubt, but I've exacerbated the problems with my own mind and what I've chosen to focus on. It's hard being honest with myself, but the truth is my default setting has reverted back to the 'old way' much of the time however much I try and deny it.

A super-simple trick I couldn't help be skeptical about

One of the first things I started doing was to write down a gratitude list. Somebody had suggested I write down a few things each day that I was thankful for - to train my mind to look for the good, to focus on what's right instead of the 'wrong.' Much of this simple technique is the basis of the 'positive psychology movement' which instead of the usual focus of looking at what's wrong, it looks for what's right. See links below.

5 Things a Day 

I'm starting slowly again, so my commitment to myself for the next 10 days is to write down five things I feel grateful/thankful for, just to get the ball rolling. Hopefully, like riding a bike, it'll come somewhat more naturally than the first time. I'm keeping it as simple as possible as you'll see. I could start again with esoteric Tantric meditations and such (they're great!), but I feel the need to go back to basics. So here goes -

1 .I feel grateful for the roof over my head which provides shelter, protection, comfort and peace.

2. I feel grateful for my wonderful girlfriend who I love dearly and adds so much more to my life.

3 .I feel grateful for my diverse, crazy, talented and inspirational friends.

4. I feel grateful for my mind and body which enables me to experience life itself.

5. I feel grateful for my will to improve myself.

That's it - now I'll read out loud these sentences 5 times each, and reread them before bed tonight.

Please feel free to join me on this challenge. I know it seems 'too simple' but then again, right now that's what I need. If you do to, I encourage you to try this out, and chart your own experience over the coming days.

Here are a few links re Positive Psychology. Enjoy :)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Positive_psychology

https://positivepsychologyprogram.com/

https://books.google.com.hk/books?id=qreACUdDAc0C&redir_esc=y