Find the prompt here:
@daily.prompt/17-january-2025-mariannewests-freewrite-writing-prompt-day-2620-i-need-this
I need this. I need to write daily. I need to read daily. These things are good for me, they make me feel good. Why do things that make me feel good feel hard to do? I'm tired, I have a long to-do list that never is finished, and it feels selfish to take the time to read and write and rest. And I know this is capitalism's culture, and it's killing us. And I don't want to live that way. But it's hard to push back against the feelings in my body, the feelings of guilt that I'm not doing something more productive, or something that I know someone else wants me to do (my mom. I'm talking about my mom). It's kind of hard merging households with one's parent as an adult. It doesn't exactly feel like a merged household. Yet it does. It's more like a merged household in that it's the household none of us want, rather than the household all of us want. That sounds harsh and it's not exactly true, but it kind of is. Each household does not feel the total freedom to make the household what we would want it to be. Our desires for what a household should be are different than my mom's. So we're all making compromises and no one is happy. Again, I'm being harsh. It's not that we're not happy. It's more that we're not free. If that makes sense. And I have this fear or feeling that I'm being judged, that we're being judged, and maybe my mom has that feeling too.