Whether it is innocent or not, it is not uncommon to hear those words spoken to me as the only child's mother:
"You just have a kid?"
Yes, just one child
There is something damning and almost insulting about this statement. "Just," it proves to me that a child is not enough. It recommends that everyone should have more than one child, or very few "only" shout, "Oh, you have only one child, it's nothing, I have many children, so many work now!"
I say here that the world is just enough "enough" It's a complete legal choice for kids enough to work it enough. I chose a child, and when I considered others, it did not work for me because of health and divorce. At this moment, I cherish and love having a single child. Why I choose to have a child, it was for a health problem or simply because I wanted only one child, no one's business is there. For a woman there is no child, 10 children or two children, there is no need for the account. Our reproductive plans are carved on our own. We can only expect that if a man is a child, then he takes care of his motherhood and grandfather in two or ten.
And what is really fired me insinuation that "just a child" is not allowed to work, I'm sure that running a family of multiple children is like running a free ward, but "one child" still works. Besides, this is not just the problem of the mother of my only child that someone else likes to add work to the children and me - or the mother of another mother - we have no reason to be the only child. I put a gun to someone's head and asked him to have a lot of kids. So when you call me "just a kid", as I give my personal spouse every day of my life, I want to remind you that your comments are insulting, not supporter of the mother, and in many ways can be estimated. A woman may have two healthy children and someone else may not be healthy. Do you think there is more work? Another mother can be a single parent, and a mother of three may have a comfortable lifestyle and active parents and partners. Who would say easy or difficult?
And besides, why are we demanding the status of martyrs so why are so unstable in the mother's womb? Instead of raising the woman who is the worst, instead of single-parent marriage, working on the mother's home and the mothers etc., instead of acknowledging that every mother and every family has their own unique battle; It does not matter how he is, whether he does not work or not, and if he marries, divorced and copenering or parenting alone 24/7 this invisible war and "who is the worst", in this war we ourselves and our daughters We're creating an ineffective and weaker environment. So cross your metaphor and try to see each unique situation as it happens.
When you see one's mother, do not assume that it is easy. Really? Sometimes it is more of a child's hospitality because we simply can not say, "go play with your brother," but thankful for me, my daughter is independent. Quite frankly, the idea of having multiple children makes me a little slim I have loads of honor for mothers under the castle with multiple children, especially those who emerge from three or more. Girls you joke! But for this maiden, a child is enough work, enough love, enough joy, enough pain, and enough in my heart that I can keep the moon happy that I can call myself a mother
At least not least, let us forget the pain in the mother's womb, when you say those uncomfortable words: "The only child." I was only aware of multiple mothers with children that nobody else was on the card for health, financial, or fertility reasons. When you open your mouth and knock it out, "Oh, just a baby," you have a possible cardiovascular heart sensation at the bottom of your comment. Maybe mother does not want to be "just a child", but she has got it and she is grateful for that child.
Ladies, if you throw away one, two or five children, then everyone should be here for each other, in fact, in the person and the soul, the woman and the mother. If we only banded together as a unit - all races, classes, and identity mothers - we will be a most powerful group