Once upon a time there was a couple who felt invincible, they were young, ambitious and had their future planned out - all sunshine and roses. They got engaged, got married, started a successful business...they did everything right. When they decided to grow their family however, they realised their plans weren't going by the book, something happened.
Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Amie. In 2013, my husband and I were diagnosed with unexplained infertility. This means that there is no medical reason to be found why we can't conceive. We are young, we are healthy. To date we have either been actively trying or "going with the flow" for 7 years.
(image source: https://www.checkpregnancy.com/family-dollar-pregnancy-test/)
We started our journey to conceive in 2010
The diagnosis was extremely hard to come to terms with. How can you fix something that is UNEXPLAINED? The Drs loaded us with vitamins, hormones and diet plans - all to no avail. We tried acupuncture, Chinese medicines, sperm friendly lubricants, moon cups - you name me, we most likely tried it. I had a bunch of invasive medical investigations done, so did my husband. This was really not the way we planned starting our family - we were invincible right???
In 2014 we did a medicated round of IUI (Intrauterine Insemination). I had to inject myself with hormones for 14 days. During this treatment I produced 8 eggs. We followed the specialists instructions to the tee. IT FAILED. We were devastated, we really thought this would work. We were advised that we could try IUI again, but that each time we tried it the chance of falling pregnant through this treatment would be lessened. Th Dr then suggest that we rather opt for IVF, which has a higher success rate (high my butt)!
"the chance for a healthy women to conceive from IVF treatment is 35%, this percentage decrease with each attempted IVF procedure"
IVF - got to have money in your pocket
We spent the next few weeks, make it months researching IVF. We also spent this time doing research on HOW THE HELL WILL WE AFFORD IT! Our Dr quoted the procedure at R65 000 (about 4900 USD). We could scrape money together from different accounts and sources, but it all seemed so extreme - it was a gamble. It wasn't just the money though. As much as I wanted to be a mother, at that point in time I had lost the energy and stamina required to proceed with more invasive and timed treatments - or perhaps I just couldn't muster up the courage. My husband respected my decision, he was as caring and as understanding as could be!
"IVF WASN'T FOR US"
In 2015 we researched adoption - this on the other hand felt RIGHT! Like it was obvious all along that this is how we were meant to start our family. We started volunteering at a baby home and this is when our hearts really opened up to the idea. So we started the application process. We where very lucky in that we were matched with our son in less than 4 months! Our son is perfect, he completes us, he is meant to BE.
While IVF is an answer to prayers for many - it wasn't for us. While I don't encourage anyone to brush it off as an option, I do hope that you will investigate adoption - I LOVE HOW WE STARTED OUR FAMILY.
End note: To date we are still trying to conceive, but we are extremely casual about it - you never know!We do feel complete though and I don't have any urge to "be pregnant". We will adopt again in the near future, whether I fall pregnant or not. I AM INVINCIBLE - I MADE THINGS HAPPEN!
Much Love - 
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